That's probably partly why I've been so quiet as of late. Because you know those early weeks - when everything is shitty and nausous and you're exhausted and all you want to do is complain? Well trust me, it's hard to think of other things to write about when that's the case.
I've always found it so ironic that some of the hardest months of a woman's pregnancy are during that time when she may not want to actually be "out", if you will. Don't get me wrong - if you're one of those subscribers to the "when I know everyone will know" way of announcing, then coolio for you. But if you're not - then you've essentially sentenced yourself to suffer in silence, trying to act normal when really all you want to do with throw up all over someone colleague's desk.
So yes - that's the whinge - it's been a rough couple of months. But I think I'm rounding the corner. Energy levels definitely seem on the uptick, and the nausea is being held off with some timely B6 supps (instead of downing Diclectin like they were tic-tacs, which has been my strategy from wk 6 to now-ish).
And hey! Sidebar! Did you know that Diclectin is essentially B6 with a little antihistamine thrown in? Because I just found this tidbit out yesterday and was kind of bummed that essentially I could've spent $5 on vitamins vs $75 and saved myself a few nosebleeds. (b/c dry winter-heated-air + antihistamine = nosebleeds -- hurrah!)
Other things that are different this time round (besides me being almost 3 years older and clearly worse for wear on the whole, how your body handles pregnancy thing). What's been different:
- I could eat more cheese and butter and bread and other grease-saturated, carb-infused food than all of Paris.
- Fruit and green vegetables? Can mostly suck it. Last time I prided myself on eating fruit salads for breakfast and snacking on frozen raspberries at night. I literally could not get enough of various types of fruit. This time? I can force myself to eat *some* fruits (i.e. really having to force down those usually yummy and well-loved pomegranates) - and vegetables? Unless you're a potato, we don't have much to talk about.
- Weight gain - hilariously I haven't actually GAINED a lot of physical pounds. Like, a total of 3 pounds I believe. (With Maddie I started gaining weight almost immediately). But WOW have I pouched out. Like full-on 5 month preggo looking by 6pm. Which brings me to the...
What has been the same (or similar) to last time:
- Gas. Not stinky, embarrasing styles. Just, you know... buildup. In the form of above said pouchy tummy. Looking like I swallowed a pumpkin or small watermelon by about dinner time. I had that last time too - but I guess since I was tinier then, the actually "pooch-y-ness" of it all was also smaller. From what I remember - this never went away... hello Gas-x.
- Nausea - again, it's just worse this time. Or was. I do think I'm almost over it (don't you DARE come back and jinx me because I said that out loud).
- Exhaustion - how can you tell if this is worse or the same this time? I don't think you can. Last time I had the luxury of resting when I needed to. Nowadays I have to resist the urge to drug Maddie with Tylenol at nap time in hopes of extending it to a solid 3+ hours. Resist the urge, I said. I don't actually do this. Just thought about doing it, once or a hundred times...
- Sleep (lack of it) - already happening. Damn you freaky realistic nightmare-y vivid dreams + ridiculously small bladder. My total sleep has probably suffered by about 2 hours a night. I know this happened last time, I just can't remember if it started so early?
So yeah - things are different, things are the same. I think week 9 was the pinnacle of shitty-ness, and we've reached that peak and heading downward into the realm of normality again. Goals for second trimester include: exercising regularly again (with all that added energy!), eating as many vegetables as I can possibly stomach, starting to potty train Miss M.
Say it with me: hahahhahahhahahahahha!
Whatever. I like goals...