Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Chin hickeys and dog toots

Katie has hit that adorable baby stage where she has learned to give kisses. Of course they are open-mouthed, slobbery wet baby kisses - and my aggro little troll-baby will grab my face/ears with her talons hands and pull me towards her until she's essentially biting my nose, chin, cheek - whatever she can get her mouth on. She's a girl who knows what she wants alright - and lately, that's giving my chin the whatfor whenever she's feeling particular amorous. Heh.

Not to be outdone, Maddie has picked up the rather disgusting habit of licking my face whenever she gets the chance. I think she's coming in for a snuggle and next thing I know she's got her tongue in my eye. It.is.gross. And the more I protest the grossness of it all, the more determined she is. I think I will bookmark this post "Things To Embarrass My Teenage Daughters With".

When I'm not getting facially assaulted by my offspring, I've been spending time in the backyard doing training romps with my pup. Who hasn't learned the concept of "gentle" yet. This means, while training him with treats in hand, my fingers have been chewed, nipped, mouthed and any other synonym for BITTEN that you can find. In freezing cold winter wind - that's a.w.e.s.o.m.e.

Sidebar: all this training is due to starting our "puppy" classes last week - we're practicing so Seamus isn't such an embarrassment next time. Because, OF COURSE he was the worst behaved dog in the class, right? To put it bluntly he was a barking, anxious, crazy, jumping asshole dog during our first class. And because I may or may not be Type-A-Crazy, I've spent an inordinate amount of time training the hell out of him to try and ensure he at least wins Most-Improved this week.

All this training has meant a lot of treats for our little Shame-Wow, and that in turn, has meant I get stunk off the couch in the evening. Damn. It is potently disgusting. Horrible breath and other gassy smells - definitely a strong CON in the list if you're considering dog ownership.

Ah yes, chin hickeys and dog farts - my life is so exciting.


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