Those are the things that I will miss...

I can't remember (and can't be bothered to check back through old posts) if I've posted about the issues we've been having, trying to get Miss Thing to take a bottle. Yes, she was an old pro at taking the bottle up until about a month ago. She would take a bottle from anyone, anytime - whether it was expressed breastmilk or formula - she didn't care, she'd just suck it back.

Then I decided that I needed to start weaning her in preparation of heading back to work, and Miss Thing decided that she HATED bottles. She'd push them away. Scream. Cry. Look at you with terror filled eyes that minute you moved one towards her. Seriously kid. How do you KNOW what I'm trying to do?

I had thought perhaps her newfoundlove of breastfeeding had more to do with teething than anything else (although it seems that teething was the excuse we would use for any different behaviour, and still no teeth)... but then! We had teeth! Two in fact! So I thought, maybe she'd start taking a bottle again.

We've given up on the formula route. I've tried it. It DOES taste horrible. So we're not pushing that anymore. I've got enough breastmilk in the freezer to get us through the month anyways - and we've been slowly (with Dr's permission) introducing cows milk to her as well - mostly through a sippy cup.

At any rate, she has started to take a bottle - slowly. She only takes a couple of ounces at a time (most being about 3 oz) ... and apparently a baby 10 months old should be taking 6-8 oz in their bottles. But she still nurses throughout the night, and she's tiny - so maybe expecting her to take 6 oz at a time is too much? This is what I'm telling myself anyways...

The other challenge of bottle-feeding (eventually an added bonus, but challenge initially), is that it's more a scheduled feeding routine. I guess if you expect a baby to take 6-8 oz at a time, you have to space the feedings out. But going from breastfeeding, where she definitely was a snacker - feeding up to 10 times a day ... well, that's tough to transition to. So not only am I introducing a bottle to a reluctant audience, I'm also having to semi-starve said audience to try and incorporate some type of schedule.

Luckily we've made a bit of headway this week, and I'm hoping by the end of next week to have her cut down to breastfeeding only first thing in the morning and in the evening. And we'll stick with that routine for a little while - at least as long as my milk holds out. Sorry - this may be TMI for some readers ... should I have labelled this blog post with a disclaimer warning? Some content may offend? :)

Anyways - that was a very long preamble to my original thoughts that inspired me to write this post. For mothers, weaning always comes a bit of nostalgia I think. And as I've been nursing these past couple of nights, lots of thoughts of how incredibly quickly a baby grows up in their first year have passed through my mind. Just how far she's grown already just blows me away - and knowing the next few months are going to bring more and more changes - it does make you a little melancholy for your little peanut.

So I wanted to memorialize a few of the cute-as-pie things that she does - that I know she won't do forever - and that I know I will miss very soon...

• The way she rubs her feet together when she's nursing. It's such a blatant "tell" of enjoyment that I've never seen before - I love it.
• The "breaks" from nursing, where she reaches up with both hands for my face to give me a big wet baby kiss (this one is new and possibly the most adorable thing she has ever done in her lifetime - I will definitely miss those mid-nursing-kiss-breaks).
• Watching her go from agitated/revved up/hyper to a calm/dozing/blissed-out-baby, after a long nursing session. Just last night I told Seth how much I was going to miss nursing after I finally got her calmed down from a big temper tantrum/crying mess - just by putting her on the boob for a bit. It's not just for hunger, it's also like the baby chill pill. I dread the day that I can't make things all better just by 'whipping it out'.
• The phantom sucking, when she's nursed herself to sleep and I'm about to put her down in her crib. She's laying there, with her little tongue stuck slightly out, doing a sucksucksuck motion every few seconds. I need to get it on video as it's one of our favourite cute-isms that she does, and she's down it since birth, and we still don't have it documented.

There's already so many things that she no longer does that I already miss...

• Top of the list definitely has to be the "milk drunks". That drunk, dozy, half-asleep state that she would get into after nursing. This was really only a newborn thing - lasting about a month, and it would usually only last for like 10 minutes - back when that was the length of her naps! Hmmm, maybe I don't miss that so much after all...
• The ability to nurse her anywhere! I really miss that - when she was just all about food and had no concept of the outside world - nothing distracted her and I could actually just walk around with her on the breast (with the help of a baby sling) and she'd just nurse away.
• The snorting-snuffling-little-piggie sounds she used to make. Definitely a newborn thing. I used to call her my little piglet. Another thing that I wish I memorialized on video that I didn't.

But, what list would be complete without "those things that I WON'T miss"...

• The D.R.A.M.A of trying to nurse her while out and about now. If she's not able to lay down, on a bed, with no sounds/distractions going on, then she just won't nurse. Yeah - I won't miss having to ask anyone and everyone if they mind if I "use their bed upstairs to feed her?" ... some people gave me looks that blatantly said "what the...?". The spa-style nursing sessions won't be missed. Well, except for the right before bedtime ones...
• The teeth. 'Nuff said.
• Her random preferences for 'sides'. She will sometimes fight fight fight me, and then I'll just switch to the other side and she'll nurse away like it ain't no thang. So I walk around for the next 4 hours completely lopsided. (I know, I know! Stop reading if you're grossed out!)
• The sleepless nights. My unofficial poll has shown me that formula babes (on average) sleep through the night by now. And breastfed babes don't. Trust me - I know this...

Wish me luck this week and next. I hope by this time next week, I'll be able to report that we are down to 2 feedings a day, and 2 bottles a day. Hopefully...

xxoo.S