Friday, May 2, 2008

Bad Mommy, Part II

I use the monitor every night because of the way our house is set up. Our bedroom is across the hall from Maddie's room, but because of the hallway in our room, I don't trust that I will always hear her cries between the doors.

Well, guess what happened last night? At some point during the night I must have turned the monitor off as I was about to go in to her, then fell back asleep. That's the only reason I can imagine anyways - because when I woke up at 6am (her new 'awake' time which I'm now trained to) - the monitor was off.

She had awoken at 11:30 and I had fed her then, and I know the monitor was on at that point when I went back to bed. So somewhere between 11:30 and 6 I turned it off. And I slept straight through. I highly doubt that she did (considering she never does).

Which means I guess we practiced some serious CIO (cry it out) technique last night. Seth thinks that if she was really crying that I would have woken up. I'm not so sure, considering I didn't wake up at all - which means I was in a deeeeeeeep sleep.

I feel guilty as all hell thinking about her laying in her crib crying out for me, and me slumbering away in my bed, completely oblivious.

But she's just as happy this morning as she ever is - so either a) she slept through the night as well, or b) she harbors no grudge against mommy.

So maybe I don't feel so guilty. Just a little guilty...


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