32 weeks

I had a conversation with someone a few weekends ago, who asked, "how much bigger do you think you could possibly get?" (note to people - don't say these kinds of things to pregnant women - I don't care if you're family or close BFFs, or it's just a "joke" - because having to actually respond to these stupid remarks makes a person feel defensive - and that's just shitty - trust.)... but anyways, I was "nicely" trying to explain to him that indeed I could get much larger - and that I didn't think I was all that much larger than I was first time around, when I still had 2 months to go.

Because - remember those last few weeks? Where your skin feels so tight it's like it's going to split at the slightest bit of pressure? Barely being able to fit behind the steering wheel in your car? And needing to nap every 2 hours or so of being awake because you're barely sleeping at night?

In comparison? Right now? I feel effing fantastic. Nimble as a ballerina. So that's the nice thing about the 2nd time around - you KNOW how lumbering and swollen and uncomfortable that you're gonna get - that in fact the lead up is much easier because you enjoy the freedom that you still have.

That being said, I posted on Facebook last week that I was so excited the weather was warming up, simply to remove the necessity of me having to grunt and groan trying to put socks on. Because socks? Are not a preggo's best friend.  Cheezies, on the other hand....

Other things that have changed? The movements - less kicky kick kick and more the rolling, elbowing, alien-baby-inside-me-feeling. My appetite - gone way done. Assuming this is probably due to my stomach being jammed up into my  throat right now. I mean - I'm still eating. Just not contemplating the complete and utter destruction I will be making on a bag of sour kid candies in the car on the drive home at night. In other words, the days of eating with the abandon of a wild hog is over. At least for now... And swelling - it's started a bit - just in the calves + ankles, at the end of the day. Again, thank god for flip flops.

8 weeks to go. Nursery prep is happening this weekend for sure, as I am free of Hubs and Miss M - which means I can actually get things done. I will be enjoying my vacation.... thoroughly.

xxoo.S

The resilience of children

We had a sick weekend here at Casa V - Maddie came down with a fever by noon on Saturday and ground productivity for the weekend to an effective halt. Luckily the fever was easily managed by Tylenol, but it's still upsetting to see your little boo get cranky and flushed and incredibly unhappy every 4 hours as the medicine wears off.

But the flip side - watching how incredibly happy and mobile she was while the meds WERE working - now that's a sight.

Is it just me? It always amazes me how well kids deal with illness. Or I should say, how my kid deals with illness (can't really speak from experience about others - but have heard similar sentiments). It's like - they're only taken down and out when it's really serious. But some sniffles? A few aches and pains? A sore throat or even light fever? Without fail, Miss M is smiling and happy and playing her way through it.

So here's my question? Is it just because we're older and therefore just that much closer to death (har dee har har) that makes us unable to fight the temptation to pull the covers over ourselves and block out the world when we're feeling sick? Or barring be able to do that (because, really, when's the last time you ACTUALLY spent the day in bed, taking care of yourself when you were sick - and men, this question is not for you!)... just how well do you find yourself coping with the feeling of being sick?

I'm not going to sugar coat it. I'm a whiner. I'm a total table-for-one, host-of-the-pity-party. I like to call MY Mommy and tell her all my ailments so she can tell me what I should do (which, being a nurse, usually is, stop feeling sorry for yourself, take some Advil and drink some tea).

And don't get me wrong. A sick Maddie is a miserable house over here 60% of the time. But it's the other 40%, where she's spinning around the living room singing some Cinderella song at the top of her lungs, that makes me go, huh. Wonder if it's just mind over matter. And if being so self-aware (and self-pitying) is really worth it...

xxoo.S

Snippets

There were no posts all of last week because of work stuff, life stuff, the busy schedule that spring seems to bring everyone. But it all culminated in a fantastically productive meeting with the bossman on Friday and means several projects that have been slightly languishing in nowhere land have been given the green light and I have a busy busy plate for my last 2 months.

And last 2 months it is - we're on final countdown. I gave my "official" notice and June 11th is my last day of work. Which means I get a week and half to myself before my due date of June 23rd. The response from everyone when I tell them this is, "Wow, you're working right up to the end, huh?" The response from Hubs? "Giving yourself a nice little cushion, huh?"

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April is the "Month of Birthdays" amid our group of friends' children. We hit up our 2nd kid's birthday party this past weekend and have one more birthday party to attend next weekend. This was a pirate-themed party and watching Maddie play a piratized version of Pin the Tail on the Donkey was possibly the most adorable moment of our weekend. PS - you know what freaks my 2.5 year old out? Putting a blindfold on her amidst a group of excited kids.

But you know what's not fun? 6 screechy kids all hopped up on sugar*. When I can't drink the noise away. Damn you co-parents that had beers in your hand this weekend. Damn you...

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We still haven't painted the nursery. I did make the attempt to really get it done this weekend - but got sidetracked while cleaning out the room (the closet had been relegated as part-clothing storage, part-craft storage, part-spare-linen storage and part-wrapping-paraphernalia storage). So while I started taking all of this stuff down to the basement, I realized the basement MUST BE CLEANED. NOW. IMMEDIATELY.

I'm not going to be a tattletale, but this may have caused some dissension amongst the ranks. For those firmly on the side of "Sunday is the day of rest". Okay, I will name names. The Hubs. He thought I was bonkers. I got angry. There may have been some shouting. That's all I'm gonna say...

Sidebar: I think with every positive pregnancy test, the doctor should be required to take the husband into a room where he is forced to watch a couple of educational videos called, "The Importance of Hormones" and, "The Nesting Instinct". Perhaps this could be combined into one video called, "Survival Guide: The Irrationality That Will Consume Your Life For The Next 9 Months - And How To Learn To Say Yes, Dear".  

Yes, with the clarity of a Monday morning, I see that perhaps I was being a little unreasonable in my demands that the ENTIRE BASEMENT MUST BE ORGANIZED. NOW. ASAP. SHOULD'VE BEEN TAKEN CARE OF MONTHS AGO. WTF?!?!?!? The urge to nest has hit me much harder this time around. At least I think it has. Perhaps all the packing and preparations to move into the house helped to funnel some of those urges last time. Who knows. But this time? Oh yeah. It's full-on crazy. Like, get the urge to clean the bathroom at 5am when I wake up for the gazillionth time to pee, kind of crazy. Poor Hubs.

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I'll leave you with a little Maddie-ism that she pulled on us this morning. (Prefacing it to say, I see the devil coming out in her more and more. Manipulating. Guilt-tripping. Stubborn as a mule. It makes an a-type female such as myself so very proud...) Doing the breakfast thing, she was offered another yogurt, various types of fruit, cheerios and juice. To which everything she responded, "No. Maddie no want." And clearly realizing what a little pain in the ass she was being, she looked up at the Hubs with a gleam in her eye, "Maddie say no to EV-WE-TING!"

xxoo.S

*To my nearest and dearest - I love your children, I really do. And I enjoy the excuse to come and hang out with you for a few hours at a party. And I like the gift-giving and the cake-eating. But I really think we all need bigger houses. Or finished basements. Or soundproof rooms - if these parties are going to continue. ;-)

Dear Maddie (the two and a half version),

It gets old saying this all the time - but HOLY CRAP how much you have changed in just 6 months. You are a little person. With opinions on.... everything.

• Fashion. Which, for the record, I usually try to respect - but wearing your fancy white dress to daycare on one of the rainiest, muddiest days we've seen all Spring. Wasn't going to happen - ever. And I have a thing about white before the May long-weekend. (I blame that on my mom)
• Food. And this opinion changes almost weekly. Sometimes potatoes are acceptable. Most times they are not. Usually blackberries are the bees knees. Sometimes they are the devil. You do have a few constants though. My lemon chicken, brocolli, green beans, watermelon and Nutty Cones (but only when shared with Daddy).
• Books. Again, you like to switch up favourites, but with a fun little twist. You call them different things. Peter Pan is currently called the Orange Book. Which wasn't easy, when you were demanding the ORANGE BOOK ORANGE BOOK ORANGE BOOK one night at bedtime, and we had no idea what the hell we were looking for. I practically tried giving you the Home Depot flyer, because that's orange, and OMG please just stop shouting at me.
• Daycare drive. You like Daddy to drop you off at daycare. And you like when I pick you up. We haven't exactly determined why this is. And why the world meltsdown when this isn't possible. But ... yes. You have your reasons I'm sure.
• Driving. You don't like it when I take a different route home from daycare. And (usually) don't love stopping for the mail on the way home. I like to think you're just so excited to get home and spend time with me, that you don't want to delay it at all. But I think it's just a routine thing and you, my dear, do not love change. I wonder where you get that from?

But even with all those opinions, at the same time, you're also one of the happiest little girls I could ever imagine. You belly laugh at my lame silly jokes. You smile and make funny faces with Daddy at the dinner table. You maul Simon and chase Garfy for "snugglebuggles" while he runs away terrified. 

You'd rather be outside than in. At the park, or playing in the yard or just going for a walk. But on rainy days we craft and we bake. You bring me your apron and demand that we "make cookies for Daddy". Or you ask in the most convincing voice, "Mommy - you paint wit' me?".

I'm your daytime sidekick. Daddy is the preferred bedtime guy. He does bathtime. He reads story after story after story. He snuggles you into bed and reads one last book. You are a daddy's girl and you have him wrapped around your little finger.

I know you probably won't remember being so young, but I hope all the photos and videos we inundate you with help you remember these happy times.

Happy half-birthday bugaloo.

Love,
Mommy

I caved - he didn't

On Tues night, around 8:15pm, my resolve caved.

Me: Okay, let's just do the 3D ultrasound and find out the sex.

Hubs: Nope.

Me: ???? What? I thought you were dying to find out? I thought you were annoyed that I wanted to keep it a surprise?

Hubs: We decided to keep it a surprise, so that's what we're doing. Anyways - isn't it too late to do it?

Me: It's ALMOST too late. The ideal time is before 26 weeks, but we could still do it.

Hubs: Nope.

Me: (whining like a 5 year child at this point) But why??? I've changed my mind - I thought you'd be happy.

Hubs: You convinced me a surprise would be fun. Don't be so convincing next time.

And so... hrrrrumph.

xxoo.S

29 weeks

Nesting. That's my word for this week.

A few nights ago, while we lay in bed, I turned to the Hubs, "We HAVE to paint the nursery this weekend". 

His response? "It's Sunday night. We just got Maddie's room done. Can you give me a few days break before you line up all the things we need to do this weekend?"

But all you moms out there get what I mean, right? Feeling like you just HAVE to get this done RIGHT NOW if possible. Yes, the nesting urge is alive and well - and keeps my brain going with all the things that I'm feeling very "behind" on. Namely the nursery - getting that done, or at least painted, will make me feel a lot more relaxed. I think. I hope...

In other news, I don't have PUPPs - the rash has disappeared completely. So we'll chalk that up to crazy hormones and their wacky reaction to substances that I've never had a reaction to before.

And after being advised by my midwife to up my iron pills to 3 a day, I've felt pretty good. At least in the mornings I do - that dragging-yourself-half-dead-out-of-the-bed-in-the-morning feeling has abated. The 3pm slump still comes. And after 8pm? You'll find me curled up on the couch attempting to stay awake for at least an hour before I give up and succumb to the blessed sleep by about 9-ish.

xxoo.S

We were ready for you long weekend!

With the in-laws confirmed as built-in helpers and babysitters, we made the commitment - this weekend was:

BIG. GIRL. BEDROOM. WEEKEND.

Oh that's right - it needs the caps.

We took advantage of the outrageously gorgeous weather and painted up a storm in the garage. With the door up. As people walked by, looking on suspiciously, at an enormously pregnant woman painting a dresser.

It's low VOC paint people! I am safe! I am thoughtful of my little unborn sprog! I promise! 

I didn't really yell this at them. But I wanted to. Oh how I wanted to...

So... drumroll please... it's done. The deed is done. She slept in her big girl bed for a nap and all of last night. She doesn't seem to understand yet that she is fully able to escape the bed, should she wish to do so, at any time. AND THAT'S FINE BY US!

We caught the entire "unveiling" on video for all eternity, and if I ever find some spare time, I will post that - because the squeal of delight she gave upon entering the room was flippin' fantastic. And made it ALL worth while. As did her repeating "you turned it over" with a massive smile on her face, while she opened and closed every drawer of the dresser about 50 million times. For the record - "turned it over" means (we think) you changed over my room. Not that we literally turned shit upside down. Because, duh - clearly that's not what she meant. (That's totally what I thought she meant at first, and I was all - no, everything is it's right place. Oh, you don't mean literally? Right - I'madumbass.)

It still needs some art on the walls - but I need to figure that out. And get some paint to cover up the patching of a few holes. And find a bed skirt, because who thinks about a bed skirt in all the planning? But here's the pics anyways...

Zee fancy white iron bed that I covet and wish I could be 10 years old again for... 

thank you Costco!

My childhood dresser, that was someone else's before it was mine. 

It has been blue, pink, white, stripped + varnished, and now painted again. 

With new hardware. Dontcha just love the lil pink glass knobs?

Her reading "nook". Again - can I tell you how jealous I am of her room? 

Because dude. I want a reading nook.

The infamous chandelier for the closet. 

Adorable, perfectly sized, and matches the dresser hardware perfectly.

She likes it.

xxoo.S