She knits too!

Not Miss M silly. ME! I knit. I totally knit.

I am down with the knit-dawgs.

Jiggity.

Er? What?*

Let's start again... So this lovely weekend I decided that I was tired of my darling little snugglebum's neck being exposed to the elements and after doing a half-hearted search for a kidlet-sized scarf, decided to knit her one myself.

Enter my coolest discovery of the week - Howcast.  It is like YouTube for "how to" videos. And is superawesomefantastic if you ask me. What makes it so? Well, I went to YouTube and the "how to knit - basics of knitting" videos I found were assy. As in - moved way to fast for this newbie, and used random language like "once you've cast on, you're ready to learn the knit stitch", which of course only made me click pause while I frantically searched "cast on knitting" in the YouTube search box. And ...... scene.

The vids I found on Howcast not only showed step by step, it also has these built in little buttons in the feed that lets you go back to any specific "section" of the video. All in all - if you already know about Howcast - well, bully for you. Clearly you spend far too much time online. And if you don't - now you do. You're welcome. Your life is about to change.... for the better! I jest. (not really).

Anyways - I'm approximately 1/16 my way through the scarf (turns out I chose super-hard yarn to knit your first project with, needed larger needles and generally need to relax the hell up while I'm knitting so it's not so tight as to build a blister on left index finger from pushing the needle thru). And I'm sure to more advanced knitters out there, it's not all that pretty or done with correct form, for that matter (the whole "cast-on" thing still has me stumped).  But it's a scarf and it will be warm and she will love it.

Turns out though, as I'm chatting with my daycare provider today, there's a reason toddlers scarves aren't all that maintstream. It's a whole, uh, safety thing. Because they're going to choke each other on their scarves? Get hung up on something with it? I'm not so certain the why's, but apparently schools are starting to request the youngun's (like kindergarten age) not come w/ scarves, but instead baclava type neck coverings.

So instead of teaching our kids to learn how to live with the (gasp!) dangers of wearing a scarf, we instead should make them look like a gang of carjackers.

The school system is awesome.

xxoo.S

*Love that in 5 (10?) years I will look back at this and be mortified with embarrassment. And then spend the next week telling Maddie that I'm "down" with something. Or "jiggity". Perhaps "down with jiggity". And really, I will have no idea what I'm actually saying. Because at the ripe old age of my mid-40's I will be so out of  touch that I may still be wearing Uggs and think I'm cool.

Time to wean

It's time. I've faced the fact. We need to cut out the night-time bottle.  I am terrified of this because...

• This is really her primary source of milk. All other milk from a sippy gets, well, sipped on, for 2.8 seconds and then thrown on the floor.
• It's been a part of her bedtime routine forever - as in, this was the first (and only bottle) we were able to introduce, and she associates the bottle with bed.
• When she wakes up in the middle of the night (oh yes, she still does this - awesome, non?), it's the ONLY thing she wants and will soothe her.

The reason I am actually contemplating this upheavel in our lives?  Here's a snippet of my Saturday night (early Sunday morning):

MissM (over the monitor at an ear-crashing shout of volume): MOMMY!  MILK!  MADDIE WANT MILK!  MOMMY! MOMMY! MILK. MADDIE. PLEASE!

Me: w.t.f? roll over and think perhaps I can just ignore this away

MissM: MOMMY? MILK. MADDIE MILK. MOMMMMMMMMMMMMMYYYYYYYY...

Me: blearily look at clock. 4:effing16 in the morning. Superawesome. Go into her room and attempt to reason (with a toddler - I know - demented...): Dude - it's still night night time. How are you so awake? Go back to sleep. Night night.

MissM: Milk mommy. Maddie milk NOW.

Me: No, you don't need milk right now. You can have some in the morning. Just go back to sleep. Night night bugaloo.

MissM: instant and v. loud meltdown

Me: What the hell... I go, warm up a  bottle and bring it back up. And then I take her out of the crib and hold it for her.

It's those last 5 words that I want you to pay the most attention to.  That's right.  She won't hold her own bottle.  Well, that's not true. She will. For 1.3 seconds. Then it will fall and she'll look at me like, WTH is your prob lady?

So yeah. The wakeups are annoying enough. The having to sit for 10 mins while she drinks her bottle and then force my insomniac ass back to sleep? So not cool anymore. Because as sweet and loving as it could be - it's just.not.anymore.

But aside from going cold turkey (which I expect y'all will tell me to do), how else do you get rid of the bedtime bottle?

xxoo.S

Another birthday weekend + a case of the sick?

I know, I know. Enough with the post (pre?) dated posts already. But I need to get these out and into our so-called online journal. Otherwise we'll just look back and realize wow - we did nothing and mom just bitched a whole lot. Ohhhhhkay.... carrying on.

It was another birthday party filled weekend for us. We were supposed to be attending 2 parties, but because Maddie was fighting "the sick" all weekend (and her lack of enthusiasm at the first) made us have to miss the 2nd one unfortunately.

I don't know what "the sick" was however, as it never really culminated in anything diagnosable. There were a few sleepless nights and some low-grade fevers happening all week. And a crusty grumpy little girl. It was fun! (said with wide eyes smiling and nodding head...) Maybe 2 year molars coming in? I can't really get my head around that, since she barely done cutting her eye teeth and we all know she's breaking world records for being the slowest possible teether evah! Who knows.  Kids are germoholics.

Anyways - before bday party #1 we hit up Pingles for some good ol' pumpkin-pickin'-out. There's tonnes of other things (tractor rides, corn mazes, face painting) that you can partake in - but yeah, like I said, we were on our way places and Miss M was a wee bit grumped out.

Although you can't really tell from these pics (liar! she's a liar!)

So yeah - then it was off for an hour to a bday party where my good friend Vone (she of the magical crafting powers and coolio blog: How to do...something) put together pretty much the coolest bday cake strategy for a roomful of toddlers (and young 'uns) that I ever did see.

Cupcakes. Sorry - a rainbow of cupcakes. That the kids could decorate. Each guest got a section tin, with candies and chocolates and assorted cupcake decorating  paraphernalia.

They got to pick a cupcake and decorate it (and then eat it of course!). All in all - a pretty fantastic idea. The kids had fun. The parents had fun. Oh - and almost forgot my fave part - she (because she's crafty like that) also made each child their own apron. Like a little pint-sized lovely adorable apron that we got to take home. And since we've just started baking together (Maddie helped me make choco chip cookies on the weekend), I think that's like, the COOLEST thing ever.

After that massive sugar rush (and crash) there was no way we could make it to the other bday party, so we called it a day. Maddie slept. Hubs watched his football and I made cabbage soup.

What? You don't lurve cabbage soup? I'm done with you...

xxoo.S

Maddie's First Fingerpaint

Maddie tried out her new birthday fingerpaints on Thankgsiving Monday. It was a creative process. To some of the pics - go here.  Otherwise, just enjoy the results:

xxoo.S

Maddie turns 2

Don't you hate it when you mean to post something, and you don't do it right away, and then time gets away from you and next thing you know it's 3 weeks later?  Isn't it awesome that you can just post-date your post and in the future, anyone reading will just think you posted on that day?  I do...

So it was the weekend that Maddie turned 2. And since I'm (apparently) determined she grow up to be a total diva, yes, we called it Maddie's "birthday weekend". Because in the Vallier house, if you have a vagina, you get more than just a day for your birthday. Just sayin'.

Friday was still a daycare day for Miss Madds, so I sent her with some cupcakes to share with the gang, purchased from Brooklin Bakery (no, I didn't make them - but before you roll your eyes at my laziness, read on to the Dora cake adventure).  Fri night dinner was our mainstay Fri night dinner: fish & chips a la Krispy's (another Brooklin fave - look at us supporting the local biz!) - joined by Gramma V who came up to visit for the weekend.  With cupcakes for dessert, Maddie enjoyed her first rendition of "happy birthday". Then it was off to bed so I could finish the Dora Cake!

*sigh* Yes. The Dora Cake. This monstrosity took away close to 6 hours of my life, when all was said and done.  I think because the Elmo head of last year's bday party ended up being so easy, I may have bitten off more than I could chew.  Followed the same steps - rented the pan from Bulk Barn ($2 a day - such a steal!), purchased cake mix, icing and icing tint.

We made the cake earlier in the week (actually fun as Maddie was totally into making her DORA cake - and we got some good pics of her first baking experience).  So that was f.i.n.e.

Really, it was the icing. So much colour. So many different steps to follow. So many intricate little spaces to get the star shaped icing globs into. It was like drawing Dora all freestyle, yo!  Nothing a little wine couldn't help, right?

Yeah - I fully blame Dora's eyes on that wine.  As a good friend stated, she looks like Lisa Simpson when she was the Lizard Queen (Simpson's reference that makes me sound super old).  Or as the Hubs commented - "Why did you make Dora look like she was beaned with a 2x4?"

Whatever - it's an A for effort, right?

Sat was actual party day - so we decorated and laid out all sorts of food and awaited the guests. Maddie was super-excited for her "Dora Party". That is, until the guests arrived. Maybe it was too many people? Maybe it was that I had wake her up from her nap to attend her own party? Maybe she doesn't like seeing all these other kids playing with her toys? I dunno. But she was s.u.c.k.y. the entire time. Like Gramma/Mommy/Daddy (whoever will pick her up and carry her around) sucky. Which, well to be honest, made me a little sad - but you can't force it, right?

Cake time was a bit disastrous as well - I forget candles (so she had tea lights on her birthday cake - I'm seriously a contender for party-planner of the year). Maddie hated all the people singing (as in, looked absolutely terrified the entire time). And she didn't even notice the cake. The 6 HOUR CAKE. Wouldn't even really look at it, acknowledge that it was Dora, nothing. Although in retrospect, perhaps she didn't recognize cracked out birthday cake Dora as the Dora that she idolizes on tv.

The rest of the weekend flew by - contrary to all my claims in the past, I actually attempted to cook some turkey on Sunday. There was way to many dishes and pots and pans and time spent over a steaming oven to convince me that this effort will ever be worth it again.  Sorry mom - I'm not like you...

Hmmmm - disastrous cake, disastrous turkey meal. Sounds like I just described a pretty shitty weekend - but we had fun. Honest!

xxoo.S

Happy Thanksgiving from Maddie!

xxoo.S

PS - yes, this post was totally back-dated. Whatevs. I am not authentic. ;-)

Dear Miss Maddie,

Wow - 2 today. I've written and rewritten and rewritten today's post. You just learned and changed and metamorphised so much that I just couldn't get it.

So instead I gave myself the task of trying to capture a summary of it in a video instead.  It's over 7 minutes long (so apologies to anyone who is busy today... come back and watch later maybe?) - but I dare anyone to try and summarize someone's life in under 5 minutes.  It's bloody impossible.

I hope you look at this video someday and it really conveys just how much fun this year was.  Because holy crap - you are so much fun to be around and we just love the little person you have become.  Stay happy, stay curious and keep your humour, bugaloo.  It makes you such a special person.



Happy birthday my sweet little monkey - we love you more than anything.

Love,
Mommy

Bullet-this

I shouldn't even be posting right now - but I find when I get to write it out, it leaves my mind (if only for a bit) ... so if you don't feel like being part of my recessionerapy, carry on elsewhere...

• People who judge moms who work - like full-time at other jobs - suck. Because you know what - you're right, I HAVE a choice. And I choose NOT to raise my kids in a squatter apartment in Siberia. Because I'm pretty sure that's all we could afford on one income. I live NORTH OF 7. Haven't I made enough comprises???
• Speaking of work... Yes, I do work from home 3 days a week. Yes, my daughter is in daycare from 8-5. No, I don't think I could get as much done with her around. Seriously? Have you ever tried to write a 4 sentence email with a toddler around? Because, yeah. It doesn't work. And I'm already borderline homicidal on a good day.
• And speaking of working-from-home... No, I didn't see yesterday's Oprah. Or Rachel Ray. Or Ellen. I know you don't believe me - but I w.o.r.k. from home. I don't sit on a couch in front of the tv with my laptop open. I actually do shit. Imagine that...
• Yes, I know could tone/tighten/lose that baby weight. If I actually TRIED. I am well aware of my lack of effort and no, I really don't expect to lose weight just because I want to. (am totally lying - thought I would've dropped 10lbs just by the force of owning an elliptical)
• Am I aware that I wear less makeup/dress more casually/am wearing flat shoes? Yes fucko, I am. Am also aware that I am currently (like right now! right this very minute!) wearing jeans with stretch denim for a waist, kinda like maternity pants (but I assure you they are not...please see below). Does that mean I gave up? No. But I'm far more comfortable now, fuckyouverymuch.
• How long am I waiting to have a 2nd child? This is my fave. Here's the answer du jour: "Wow - you sure like personal questions!" Does said person often continue to badger for an answer? You'd think not right? Oh no ... they totally do. Next time I'm just going to scream in the little old lady's face at the grocery store as a distraction. Then she and the cashier can talk about how much they hope I DON'T have a 2nd...
• And lastly (and most timely of all) - no, I'm not cooking a turkey for Thanksgiving. No, I don't plan on doing so. I have a thing about raw poultry and shoving things up the bum of a bird. Yes, I'm aware this makes me weird. Doesn't mean I don't love eating turkey and all it's yummy sidekicks. Yes, I totally get the selfish, self-serving spin of this all. I'm an only child, whaddya want?

xxoo.S

The Sleep

I never knew just how much my happiness could depend on someone else's sleep. Whether they're getting enough. Or waking too often. Or waking too early...

Oh the snark - it is alive and well this morning.

In other news - I have continued to NOT use my brand new elliptical. Because I refuse to wake up at 5am to exercise. 

Read: I am not using my new elliptical because Miss M is waking at 6am every morning.

And that my friends, is lame. With a capital W.T.F.

xxoo.S

"Friend"

There is a little boy at daycare that Maddie adores. Well they adore each other, I suppose. Apparently they are inseparable and it's an example that you can have personalities that "jell" even at a preschool age.

And he really is the sweetest little boy you ever could meet. Like if your daughter, who was in daycare from 8-5:30 could be hanging out with another kid everyday, this would totally be that kid.

We knew about "Kyle" before Maddie brought it up - just from our daycare provider letting us know how adorable they were together, how much fun they had together, yadda yadda yadda.

And then at storytime at night, his name would start to come up. The random bunny on page 6 would be "Kyle's". The little boy going to bed at the end of the book was "Kyle". Again with the adorableness and that proud mama bear feeling of your child building relationships outside of her family that she enjoyed. I was such an introverted little kid that it was literally painful for me to make friends. So watching her do this with ease and charm, it was a bit of a learning experience for me.

But then came the icing on the cake. A few days ago - Maddie sitting in her highchair at dinner time, telling us random shit things about randomness, and these words came out, "Maddie play park with Kyle. Kyle Maddie friends."

You know you want to... let's do it together: Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.......

And also - she's not even 2 yet! I so love that she gets what the hell a friend even IS, much less making them like it ain't no thang.

xxoo.S

The countdown is on...

Our little Miss turns 2 in exactly 5 days. Not to sound all typical-mommy on you, but holy crap it's blowing my mind a little bit. Perhaps not the age thing, because 2 doesn't sound all that old yet. She's still in diapers. We still give her a bottle at night (I KNOW - we will wean soon, I promise). She's still a baby in so many ways.

And yet, she's totally not. She's a little girl. A little person with likes and dislikes. With a sense of humour (which still surprises me to no end - but she is the biggest sarcastic joker you'll ever find this side of preschool).

Since she's our first, I don't know from experience - but it really seems like these first two years are crazy-banana-cakes in terms of development. I think I said this after the first year too (just how much they change) - but after spending a few hours last night looking at home videos and pics from the last year - the change from October 2008 to present is bonkers.

We do timeouts now (sometimes self-inflicted if she's annoyed at us - she just goes up to her room to be alone - hi, MiniMe!). She understands the concept of "later" - as in, No we can't go to the park, but we'll go later today - I totally get called on that quite often. She recognizes letters, she's starting to count actual things (getting the concept of counting - how cool is that?), she breaks into spontaneous song (and dance). She's a little card. She loves to be in the limelight, and clearly lives for a laugh.

She's possibly the most happy-go-lucky, thoughtful, kind, funny, carefree children you could ever imagine.

Especially with two moody, selfish only-children for parents.

I jest.

Not really.

Anyways - this isn't a post about how fabulous my daughter is - because you know I'm saving that one up for Friday, right? It's just a comment on how crazy it is that we're here already. How time has flown by so fast but and at the same time it feels like it's been forever.

xxoo.S

**This post brought to you by my cheesy nostalgic feelings of motherdom after spending 3 hours pouring through photos and video archives.

"Maddie watch Dora on 'puter?"

I hear this about 5 times every day. Because I made the mistake of showing Maddie treehousetv.com a few weeks ago and HOLY HELL is it awesome. And by awesome - I mean crack for kids. And by kids... I mean Maddie.

In all honesty, it is a pretty cool site because it has colouring pages of their fave characters you can print out, a video library (for ppl that don't have the blessing that is PVR), and games. Games featuring characters from their fave shows.

Like DORA.

Maddie ♥'s Dora. Did you know that? Of course you did.

So there's a few Dora games that we play. The coolest one being Dora Bingo! Because who doesn't love a bit o' Bingo, right? Especially 8MILLIONTIMESADAY.

I know I do.

But she's looking at coloured stars and images of fruit and shit, and matching them to her Bingo! card while the hypnotizing Dora pulls card after card. That's a life skill right? Matching shit?

I think so.

In actual fact - the site is well designed with the various games that are aimed at the preschool age. And I don't have a problem with her playing on the 'puter (duh, I don't really have a choice, since she sees me on it right? s'only fair). And I won't have a problem when she's older either (after I download all sorts of safety-monitoring-not-allowing-her-to-go-anywhere-but-approved-sites-ever! software) since really we know babies in 2020 will be born with some type of network chip already inserted or something...

Anyways - that's my kudo's for the day... good job treehousetv.com - thanks for the Bingo!

xxoo.S

PS - in other news - I chopped all my hair off tonight. Gwyneth was my inspiration. I like it. Hubs likes it. Maddie hasn't noticed at all...

PPS - I love that my life update is a sentence in a post-script below the 5 paragraphs about Dora Bingo!

Already with the guilt...

It will be officially 2 weeks as of tomorrow that my new elliptical has lived under our roof and we've only partied together a handful of times.

I felt the guilt when I lied to my mom tonight, after she asked me how the new routine was going, and if I'd been using it regularly.

"Every other day...yup."

Sorry mom. I totally lied to you.

I've used it 5 times.

OMG. I lied again. What is wrong with me?

I've used it 4 times. And today barely counts, as was really only for 15 minutes as Miss M refuses to sleep past 6:15 these days and holy hell that is effing early and who the hell gets up BEFORE 6am to do anything? I can't even drink tea before 6am. It is an ungodly hour.

I knew putting it in the basement was a mistake. Although now I have an excuse for a 2nd PVR. Then I could start recording 90210 + Melrose in the basement seulement.

Then I'd have to go down there right?

Stupid aging metabolism and baby weight-gain and laziness... You're all conspiring against me.

xxoo.S

*Totally written while devouring a piece of cheesecake. Chocolate cheesecake. Because... go big or go home, right?

Tonight

During Maddie's bedtime routine...

Hubs: Have you noticed her bald spot?

Me: Errr.... her what-now?

Hubs: Bald spot. She has a bald spot. Right here. [Pointing to the middle of the back of her head - also known as her blonde spot]

Me: Dude - that's just blonde hair.

Hubs: It's not blonde - it's sparse. From all the pony tails you put in her hair. [Making the hand motion of me yanking her hair in two different directions]

Me: [snorting I am laughing so hard] You think she's going bald from my hairstyling? And seriously, they're called PIG-tails when there's two of them. How do you not know this?

Hubs: Pony. Pig. Just stop doing it while she still has some hair on her head.

Me: [continuing to chuckle and silently roll my eyes] Sure thing...

xxoo.S

PS - For the record - I put her hair in pigtails about 3 times a week. At most. So ... yeah. Not so worried that I'm balding my daughter...

PPS - Men are jackasses.

A full night's sleep

Last night was a bad combination of two factors that affect my sleep... Miss M (of course) and the Hubs.

Miss M has a bit of cold, so she was up a couple of times throughout the night - stuffy nose, wanting milk, general cuddles, that sort of way. I'm dreading the process of getting her completely off bottles - which I know we have to start any day now and o.m.g. I'm not looking forward to it (please hold off the judgement, I know she shouldn't still be getting a bottle - and yeah, I KNOW...).

But then, once I actually go back to bed - what I have waiting for me is a snoring Hubs. Which I've complained posted about before.

I don't fall to sleep all that easily at the best of times. In fact, I remember being so frustrated and angry as a child on weekends when my parents would have friends over - because we lived in a bungalow, and noise travels - and clearly I wasn't one of those kids that could sleep just anywhere (hmmm - perhaps that's where Maddie gets it from)...

So what do I do when I can't sleep and I've got a roaring Mack truck next to me (who won't roll over, or when he does roll over, manage the feat of snoring on his side)... oh I go and make myself a cup of tea and google "snoring remedies".

Because that's smart right?

Well - if you get frustrated and want to just lay there awake, or you want to actually do something about it ... I guess it's less frustrating.

And I swear, if I wasn't so fuzzy headed, I may have just ordered the RIPSNORE right then and there.

Instead, I'm forcing him to start wearing the Breathe Right strips I bought him ages ago. If that doesn't work then we may go Ripsnore. And if that doesn't work... well, I may smash him in the face with a shovel and call the plastic surgeon.

Does that sound a little aggro? Sorry... must get some sleep.

xxoo.S

How do they do it?

You know who I mean. The supermoms. The moms that have perfectly manicured gardens, perfectly coiffed hair, a tight I-run-on-the-treadmill-for-an-hour-everyday ass and floors that sparkle.

Because I see them. We all like to think they don't exist - but they do. At least they do in my neighbourhood. I see them walking their toned little butts to school with their kids. I see them having a leisurely coffee at the local coffeehouse. I see them wandering around the local parks and streets, enjoying the last bit of summer sun.

Okay, so I don't actually see inside their houses - so perhaps I'm making more than a few assumptions based on outward appearances (judger! I'm a JUDGER!!!)... but seriously? How can you not assume their homes are as put together as they are?

I work from home and feel guilty every day, as I glance up from the laptop and see the piles of laundry, and dust, and toys, and papers, and random SHIT that is just Strewn.About.Everywhere.

And at the end of the day, after I drag my (yet-again-unshowered-ew-gross) self over to our Daycare Provider's house to pick up Miss Maddie, I feel even MORE guilty as I look at her floors and practically see my reflection in the gleaming shine.

NOTE: apparently this is because she has a steam mop - which is apparently the Best Invention Ever and makes your floors gleam and look lovely and yeah. Still. She has like a thousand kids there every day and steam mop or no steam mop, she's still a rockstar for having such clean floors.

That's the one thing I kinda hate about the whole work-from-home gig. The accompanying guilt that I am far less on top of the household drudgery than I probably would be if I worked at an office. Because you always think - oh, I'll just do that tomorrow at some point - but then you actually get caught up in work and you don't and oh holy crap, there's just too much to do and maybe if I ignore it, it will just go away. But it doesn't. Of course it doesn't.

So then my weekends are spent cleaning. And that's just lame, right? Because there are far more interesting and fun things to do on a weekend than clean up the same effing dirt and cat hair and cat vomit and kitty litter trails (and OMG cats are so dirty, why did I ever think they were a good idea?).

Whew. What am I rambling about anyways?

It's just been one of those weeks (months?) where everything seems to be piling up with work and at home and I think I'm just giving myself a bit of a pep-talk to get my ass in gear to get on top of it.

I will start this weekend. Perhaps I just need to Try Harder, non? (wink, smile, rolling my eyes)

xxoo.S

Happy Feet

I had gotten slightly sick of Maddie's obsession with the "Elmo in Grouchland" movie (3 times in one day? really? because I don't care if it's raining on Saturday - let's just go outside)... So I did what any good mother does, I picked up a different option on a recent trip to the local Superstore. Happy Feet. Looked cute. I'm a penguin fan. It was in the sale bin. What could I lose?

The first couple of times Maddie watched with wary disbelief that there could possibly be some other type of movie that our DVD player could play. And by watch, I mean she paid attention for the first 10 minutes and then tra-la-la'd along, bored because it was NOT Elmo.

And then something magical happened - she actually started liking it.

As in, asking for me to put it on. Watching for longer than a few minutes at a time. Following the story line (including the scary chase scene with a cracked-out looking sea lion that she loveloveloves - little weirdo).

I think it's the singing ... and the dancing. Really (other than the scary chase scene), that's all she cares about.

"More Baby Corn. Moremoremore Mommy!"

This is the demand I get when none of the characters are actually singing, dancing or swimming for their lives. And yes, I've tried to explain to her that the movie is still on, and she is, in actual fact, currently getting "more" of the Baby Corn as we speak (sidebar translation: Happy Feet=Baby Penguin=Baby Corn in Maddiespeak). That doesn't matter - and so we skim past the unnecessary dialogue (who needs to follow a storyline, right?) right to the dancing bits.

And she's taken to dancing along with the movie. And often randomly throughout the day. Proclaiming "Maddie Happy Feet!" while she stumbles around the house.

It is the cutest.thing.ever.

xxoo.S

Dear Maddie, your mother is a moron...

After all my braggart-ing about being super organized, I just found out all my invites that I mailed out yesterday are missing one key important piece of info.

The F'ing date.

I'm awesome. Or maybe not...

xxoo.S

PS - you know who is surprisingly awesome tho? Canada Post. Because I mailed those suckers at noon-ish yesterday. Less than 24 hr delivery. Go snail mail.

Good thing she doesn't read yet

I am in the midst of planning Maddie's birthday party. Just mailed out the invites. Have more to hand-deliver to my Babyville peeps at our GNO on Thurs.

It will be a Dora-themed party. Oh yes - we like our themed parties at the Vallier house.

So the invites are Dora - courtesy of Party Packagers. Who also have a plethora of Dora-themed party items - including a life size foil Dora shaped balloon. Isn't that awesome? I think it costs a bazillion dollars.

And the cake is already planned out. Like last year (goooooo Elmo!), I'm going to rent the cake tin from Bulk Barn and stain my hands for 2 weeks in decorating it.

So the cake, too, will be Dora.

Clearly, like any good project manager, I am all over the details of the party-planning. It is coming along without a hitch.

But I'm iffy on the present.

I am a big fan of birthdays. (I'm an only child - what do you want?) They are a big deal. Will always be a big deal in my house. Even when they're not a big deal and I don't really want to talk about how old I'm getting, and blahblahblah, there better be cake, dammit.

But Miss Maddie? She already has more toys than she knows what to do with. And really, truly needs no more clothing (remember, my trip to Target?).

So what to do for a present?

I've actually got a bit of an idea - since I brought these mini-markers back from my girls weekend trip, Maddie has really been loving the colouring again. So I think we're going to get her an easel. And maybe some fingerpaints or crafty fun stuff like that.

But as cool as I think this would be as a present (and let's be honest, how much have I been LOVING "helping" Maddie colour in her book - I used to want to work for Crayola, I was that much of a fan as a kid)... would a 2 year old like it? Or am I totally imposing my interests on her?

It's like the chicken and the egg. Do we, as mothers, just naturally do that? I loved crafting and colouring and all things glitter and gluestick throughout my childhood. Is that because my mom was crafty? And she imposed her interests on me? Or does that "calling to Crayola" just run in the family, and is Maddie's new interest in the (washable!) markers just an extension of this?

I think I may be over-thinking this. But any ideas are welcome!

xxoo.S

Why?

It is official. We have a toddler.

The dreaded arrival of the classic toddler question made it's ugly debut this weekend. On Friday night. While colouring with Daddy. In response to his gentle rebuke to not draw on her shirt with the marker.

"Why?" asks my innocent little cherub.

"Because it makes the laundry harder for Mommy." he responded. Sigh. Sad, but true.

"Oh." She was satisfied at one answer. Too good to be true. Perhaps it was just a fluke? Perhaps we had a few more blissful weeks free?

That hope was crushed first thing Saturday morning, as I greeted Miss Maddie in her crib, all touseled and still sleepy. "Ooooh Daddy at?"

"He's still sleeping Bugaloo." I responded.

"Why?"

Right. And so it begins...

xxoo.S

We laughed so hard we cried

My girls weekend getaway was all I thought it would be, and more. Of course, you're not going to get any of the gory details - we behaved ourselves, but it was so fraught with inside jokes and immature shenanigans, that I really wouldn't be all that interesting, or nearly as hilarious to you, as it was to us.

Suffice to say ... I haven't laughed that hard in a really, really long time. What is it about getting together with girlfriends you've known forever? You instantly revert to some childish version of yourself, and spend a LOT of time playing the "remember when..." game.

What I can share with you is this:

• Complimentary room upgrades rock. We enjoyed ourselves in the 3 bedroom condo-suite in the Mosaic very, very much.
• The Kalola Spa at Blue Mountain is fantastic - highly, highly recommended.
• Staying right in the heart of the "village" is also highly recommended - and while the patio lunch options are a bit pricey - they more than make up for it with all the people watching.
• I was homesick within minutes of being there, because it's far more a family resort than anything else, and my heart twanged everytime I saw a Maddie-aged-creature. SO going back for a family getaway sometime soon.
• Sitting around the table, eating cheesecake and drinking tea is the perfect way to end a crazy evening (oh Salvador - you make a mean margarita).
• Traffic coming back wasn't nearly as bad as I expected - but getting a $200+ speeding ticket was.

We have renewed our promise to annualize the GWG, every Labour Day, for years to come. I hope we stick to our promise, as I had more fun that I thought possible.

Thank you Liz, Stef, Sandra, Lisa and Melis - you are all brilliant girlfriends and I wish I saw you all more often! Or should I say... "Thank you for being a friend...."

xxoo.S

Maddie pics

The one and only time you'll ever see Maddie hold her bottle herself.

Tomato picker.

Funny faces.

Her first taste of Capri Pizza. She loved it. We can keep her.

Always a slow starter at waterparks, but she always loves them in the end.

Family pic @ Peterborough zoo.

Peterborough zoo

A bit of a drive - but a FREE zoo, with park + waterpark area attached, so we thought we'd check it out today.

It's not got a huge selection of animals (whaddya want, it's free). But enough to keep us amused for an hour or so. The barnyard animal area was interesting, as all the animals had their own "pen" but the gates were open internally, so they could hang out in each other's areas. Very friendly.

Except for the goat.

As we were about to walk away, we saw this brown, mean, angry little goat walk up the lazy pot-bellied pig (who's just minding his own, chilling in the sun), and HEADBUTT him in the stomach.

Quite laughable really. In a - ooh, that's gotta hurt - kinda way.

However, Maddie wasn't laughing...

She yelled, "Hey! Hey goat! That's not nice!"

I almost peed my pants, I was laughing so hard.

My Miss Maddie loves her animals and has a true sense of what is right and wrong in the world. And the goat has been called. Black and white. Right and wrong. You are wrong Mr. Goat.

And of course, because we laughed so hard at her little outburst, Maddie continued to repeat the "That's not nice, goat!" all day long.

Classic, non?

xxoo.S

Maddie stats

I meant to post this after her doctor's appointment ... and it's been sitting in draft for weeks - oops.

Maddie had her 18 month appt today. For immunization shots + check up. At first I was enjoying basking in all the compliments from the nurses and receptionists re: how incredibly well-behaved she was, and my, wasn't she a little grown up, and wow, she could really speak well!

And then I realized - oh - they think she's almost 6 months younger than she actually is.

So I tried to mumble out an excuse that she was actually 23 months old, not 18 months. We were just late for her shots because we don't live in the city anymore, but didn't want to change doctors just yet, and I'd been meaning to get her down for shots I promise, just time had slipped away and this is my first chance being on vacation and, and... and yeah - they were totally not listening anymore.

Chalk one up for Procrastinator Moms everywhere!

Anyways - it was not even close to as bad as I thought it would be. These shots were better. Or she handled them better because she was older? I don't know.

It's over - and that's all that matters.

And for the record - she's continuing to hold steady in the 25th percentile range: height 31.5 inches and weight 24 lbs.

My tiny little bugaloo...

xxoo.S

Maddie bits

This blog was supposed to be my excuse not to feel guilty that I wasn't updating a baby book on a regular basis (can't you hear the future conversation now? "Where's my baby book?" "Just read through the blog - IT'S ALL THERE").

But then I realized (with a little helpful nudging from a few peeps the last few days) that, um, I actually haven't written about Maddie all that much lately. So here's the latest in Maddie updates...

• Her vocabulary is incredible now. She's speaking in full sentences (as long as you don't really need articles or conjunctions to form "proper" sentences), like: "Maddie go-y park now Mommy!"
• Speaking of sentences - she is also still talking in the 3rd person. Which weirds out lots of people (like ones without kids) because, well, I guess it probably sounds weird if you're not used to it.
• Daycare continues to be awesome and Maddie loves going there. In fact has a special friend that now infiltrates our life daily. His name is Kyle and we hear about him daily. No, this does not count as her first boyfriend. That is not even funny.
• Maddie knows most of her colours now. After my obsession with her being "behind" other kids her age because of a weekend playdate I had that played on my insecurities... we worked on it and she is getting really good.
• Freezes are still her favourite food. As well as broccoli, peas (preferably raw), green beans and cherry tomatoes. So we've started making popsicles using our juicer (because I am Trying Harder) and we visit our garden nightly to go "picking". So I guess I didn't plant too many tomato plants after all...
• Life with Maddie is getting easier and harder all at once. She understands absolutely everything (including learning "concepts" - like Daddy will be home soon, Maddie happy, we'll go to the park later) so that makes life so much easier. But she also has SO MANY opinions. And is very strong-willed. And well, I don't have to explain the tantrums, right?
• Potty training is not "official" yet - but she pees about 50% of the time she asks to go on the potty which is pretty cool. So for now, we're just letting her guide us and seeing what happens.
• Along with obsession with the potty comes an obsession with "washing her hands". We got a little stool that I mistakenly showed her to put in front of the sink to stand on to wash her hands. Now if she sees that stool, she insists on washing her hands. 40 times. Maybe she'll be a surgeon...

It's day 4 of vacay and we're going to get her 18 month shots and a haircut. I expect only one of these will go well.

xxoo.S

Day 2 of vacay

I visited our neighbour to the south today for a bit of friendly cross-border shopping, as they have something lovely and fantastic and unique that Canada does not.

Target.

Have I mentioned how much I love that store? Oh, that's right. I have.

Again, I could go on and on and freakin' on about the incredible retail story that this store is. How it has aligned itself in a strategic manner that other big box/department stores are failing to do. How it's merchandised thru it's teeth. How incredibly fresh the styles are - all at ridiculously incredible prices. How the entire store embraces the brand vision and how the marketers at Target's Head Office must have orgasms every day thinking of how incredible the vision has been carried out. (That's right, orgasms. I said it.)

But I won't, because that stuff is boring and really what you want to hear about is all wonderfully pretty stuff I got, right?

For the record, I got about 90% of Maddie's fall/winter wardrobe in one-fell-swoop. I shopped with efficiency. Ruthless at times. And I payed between $3.50 and $12.00 for each piece of clothing. NOTHING MORE. Did I buy her bday dress? Oh yes, I did. Did I get her running shoes, Damn Effing Right I did - and they're Dora. Does she have the coolest Halloween daytime

daycare shirt you've ever seen? (Unless you have in fact, seen a

rhinestone skull wearing a bow in her hair, on a black tee with

orange striped sleeves - but I doubt you've seen anything that funkass cool). And did I buy her a bunch of adorable monkey-ridden Paul Frank pj's? Because those wouldn't be cute at all, right? Oh - and did I FINALLY find some retro-styles plastic barrettes (that I haven't been able to find ANYwhere - not even Dollarama, where the 80's live on)?

I think I had an orgasm, just now, thinking about it all over again.

Anyways - we had a good time. And then we ate lunch at TGIFriday's and I solved America's obesity problem: Stop eating at TGIFriday's.

Home sweet home tomo. Ktown has been a blast - and love to have the extended visit with family - but I'm ready for some downtime before my girls weekend getaway.

Oh - I'm going to have STORIES for you my bloggy peeps. Or maybe not. We'll see if it's rated PG for entertainment. In fact - let's not get your hopes up...

xxoo.S

PS - must give props to the Grandma's - we could not have furnished the fall wardrobe without your help. Thank you for being so spoiling and keeping me from the complete poor-house. I'm glad to hang out on the porch...

Erm... I was kinda kidding...

So - I didn't actually think that anyone would comment on my last post (hi FACEBOOK!) - unless you could count an *eye roll* as a comment. Can you? Because I am totally going to comment an *eye roll* on someone's blog sometime next week. That would be awesome.

Anyways - I wasn't really being serious. I mean, I kind of was. I had this convo with g-friends a few weeks ago and gave them my profound thoughts on my profound theory ... and it was a bit of laugh. As in, yeah. Try harder. Just do it. [insert platitude here]

I know we all try hard. And I really do believe that you probably try as hard as you possibly can right now. It was more tongue-in-cheek than anything...

I mean - I do berate myself on a regular basis about how much I should do more, try harder - all that nonsense. I am, in fact, very much a lazy bastard. And do plan on trying... um, harder. Soon. Very soon. In fact - as soon as this ep of BB11 is over. Then I'll do my ironing.

Insulting BB11. Now she's gone too far!!!

But yeah - because I'm not a writer (read: completely ignorant of all the grammatical rules against overusing ellipses and how in fact to structure a quote to signify a back-and-forth conversation). BECAUSE of that... I didn't necessarily capture the sardonicism with which I actually meant to post my New Philosophy On Life.

So. Yeah. Erm ... Glad if I inspired you - because Hurrah to Inspiration!

But if, instead, I came off as a postulating, arrogant twat?

Well, blame that on the writing...

xxoo.S

My new life philosophy

Yes, this post is going to be just as profound as it sounds... I have a new philosophy on life. It's like Pay It Forward - but only better (partly because it's one less word, and already I'm bringing more efficiency to your life - just in the NAME of my philosophy, one step-at-a-time peeps, one-step-at-a-time...).

Okay - here it is - you ready for it?

Try Harder.

That's it. It's pretty much the answer to everything I've found. Test it against anything that's nagging at you, bothering you, keeping you up at night.

Bothered by that extra weight you're carrying around?

Try Harder. Start exercising (you know, actually start, not just talk about starting). Don't eat so much fatty, deep-fried, fast food. Eat more salads and raw veggies. Do this - and you will lose weight - I promise. It's not gonna be easy - you will have to, you know, TRY. Maybe even Try Harder than you have before. And if you do that - you'll probably lose the weight.

Annoyed that there's not enough time in the day?

Try Harder. Get more done. Be more efficient. Turn off that episode of Toddlers & Tiaras - trust me - Just.Turn.It.Off. Now - do something. Do the dishes. Wash the floor. Balance your checkbook. Look - there you go. You're getting shit done. All it took was a little effort.

Constantly stressed by the end-of-work-day scramble - making dinner, enjoying the evening, getting the kids off to bed?

Try Harder. Prepare dinner the night before. Plan your recipes a week in advance and buy groceries only for those meals. Ask you partner for help in getting things organized. Buy a slow cooker. There's a lot of options here peeps. You just need to do some research, make some decisions and plan ahead. Yup - it's a lot of work. But hopefully it kinda becomes habit and all of a sudden your life has changed and you're less stressed and woops - is that another baby? Dammit...

Want to bring some romance back to the relationship?

This one's easy. All you have to do is Try (a little) Harder. Wear some of that lingerie you got for your wedding shower. And if that doesn't fit - go buy some. On a budget? Joe Fresh sells pretty bras - there you go, you have no excuse now. Light some candles. Throw on some romantic music (Sexy Back by JT? Why not.). Guys are pretty easy to please. You'll have to Try (a little) Harder. But not that much.

Bored with your life. Need some outside interests?

Try Harder. Join a book club. Start bird watching. Spy on your neighbours. Think about what you like and then etch out some time in the day to do it. Stop bitching and moaning about how your life is so boring and you don't have any time anymore to do any of the things you enjoy, and figure out how to make time for those things.

Some of you may be reading this thinking, but Sara..no..H, I'm trying as hard as I can. And I still can't get things done. I'm here to tell you, you're not. You can Try Harder. I promise it will make a difference.

And I know some of you are rolling your eyes (internally of course, don't want to be rude or anything...) thinking, "Oh SnH, do you expect us to be Superheroes? That's what you're telling me I need to do." Not true. You don't have to fix everything at once. But I dare you to try it out on one thing. Just one thing that you're complaining about in your head right now. See what happens...

There you go. Life altering blog posts. One-day-at-a-time.

xxoo.S

I haven't researched this yet

Maddie hit a milestone yesterday. She went pee in the potty at daycare.

In fact, it was during a diaper change, that she asked to go to the potty. Then waited until Annette left the bathroom. And then she went. Like it ain't no thang...

They called me yesterday to tell me. Which was cute and adorable. But sidebar? Whenever I see the daycare number on my phone my heart jumps into my throat a little bit. Good thing Annette is super awesome and starts every conversation with "Don't worry - everything is fine - I'm just calling to tell you..."

So Maddie told me that "Maddie pee-peed potty Mommy".

That just about broke my heart with adorableness.

So when I picked her up from daycare yesterday I had a chat with Annette about next steps. Should we start training like immediately? Let Maddie just hop on the potty when she feels like it?

Dammit - I was planning on doing this over Christmas vacation!

I have books to read. And websites to research. And training pants to buy. And...and...and...

If you haven't guessed. I'm a bit of a boyscout. And I like to be prepared. Especially when I'm hitting uncharted territory. Oh, and I'm not the most easy-going person in the world either. You mean you haven't noticed?

So yeah. Big Maddie milestone moment.

And I'm a little bit terrified.

xxoo.S

T-minus 4 days and counting...

I leave for vacay as of this Friday night at 7pm. It's not a big trip. It's not an exotic destination. But - it is a Full.Week.Off.

So excited, am I.

But also a bit flustered. Because (and doesn't it always happen this way), the sh*t has hit the fan at work and I need to get about a TRILLION things done before I will be able to go incognito for a week.

Or I will just have to bring my laptop with me.

Who's kidding who? My laptop is totally coming with me.

But hopefully just so I can update my blog with my fun mini-adventures with Maddie.

Hope you all had a great weekend. We did. Especially Miss M - who ate her weight in cherry tomatoes. But that's another story...

xxoo.S

Spoiled but easy

I was always the first one to roll my eyes (internally, of course) when at the mall, seeing a child start to kick off and watch as his/her parent would scramble to quiet them (eye rolling would be far less internal if the parent in question actually did nothing to shut their kid up).

Often that scramble involved capitulating to the demands of some type of toy, candy, whatever. And I would shake my head and just think, well, that's why they're screaming, genius. You giving them what they want is only teaching them to scream for what they want next time.

Oh, it is so easy to be pious and judgemental when you don't have a screaming, whiny kid of your own...

Fast forward a few years - and here I am. On the brink of the "terrible two's" and capitulating to Miss M's demands far more than I'd like to admit.

Although, here I am, admitting it to my own little self-help group of the blogosphere...

In actual fact, I'm the "bad cop" in our family. Seth - well, he gives her pretty much anything she wants the minute she starts to ask for it. Me? I'm only about 50/50.

Regardless - I fully blame us, not her, for the little demanding monster she is becoming. Instead of asking for a drink like a normal human being (which, at the age of 22 months, she is more than capable of doing), she SCREAMS and starts CRYING as she asks for it. We're like, dude? Relax. We'll get you effing juice.

Sidebar - I know I talked about us going cold turkey on the juice offering at home - and well, this is a post about spineless parenting, okay? I know I (we) need some work.

So yeah - the full one tantrum before she's even asked for something. Before we've even had a CHANCE to say no?

Lame. And unacceptable. And no way in hell am I living the next 18 years like this.

And I get that she's still young. That she's in a very egocentric stage, because that is where her brain is. I get it.

However I also think that we take the easy road much more often that perhaps we should. That we aren't teaching her that sometimes it's okay to be disappointed, and that people are going to say no, and that them's the rules.

Other bad habits (besides the evil juice habit) that I fully blame us for?

• Watching tv while eating dinner. Like a zombie. Oh I hate this so much.
• Screaming 99% of the time we go to leave the park. Like on the ground, full-on tantrum, screaming. Carrying her fireman-style out of the park while other parents try not to stare (but you know they totally are and being thankful that they are not you at that moment in time).
• Demanding tv shows that she wants to watch (a lot). So yes, the amount of tv we let her watch bothers me. And the fact that we've taught her (through the technology of PVR) that she can get Dora or Elmo or Loonette just by asking (read: demanding) it, is beyond irritating. Instant gratification and 2 years old are a bad combo to introduce.
• Refusing to drink milk. At all. Ever.

So yeah - the road to a spoiled kid is an easy one. Without much headaches. Makes life a lot more enjoyable than a screaming toddler.

But I recognize it's getting out of control and we need to take steps to reign it in a bit.

Poor Maddie - her life is about to change a bit...

xxoo.S

PS - this wasn't meant to be a post about how whiny my kid is. Or how shitty of a mother I am. I know I'm a good parent. And she's an awesome, sweet, lovely, little girl. It was more of an observation of what I know I can do better.

Happy 4 years babe

I'm going to get a little prosaic here, but wow - four years. Sometimes it feels like an eternity, and sometimes it feels like our wedding day was only a few weeks ago.

We've travelled together. Bought a house together. Had a child together. Created a home and a family. A little unit with inside jokes and eye-roll annoyances and our own little quirks and habits.

You drive me a little crazy when you bite your nails, when you leave your towel on the floor and with your obsession over football. I drive you a little crazy with my ability to clutter up any space with papers, my ability to nag about anything and when I watch ridiculous shows like "The Hills".

I fall in love with you a little more every day when I see you with Maddie. How patient and outgoing and loving you are with her. So removed from your "persona" that everyone is used to seeing.

I enjoy that we're still learning about each other. Still learning from each other, even after knowing each other for over 15 years.

So happy anniversary, boo. Love you and all that jazz...

xxoo.S

The ironic thing is that the Hubs doesn't read my blog. He doesn't like to "read" in general unless it's a fantasy football magazine. Whatever - just means that I can lambaste him on here as much as I want right? I really need to start taking advantage of this...

My new juicer

Isn't really new. It's actually a wedding gift that I decided to unearth from the basement.

In reality, it's actually quite a fabulous machine. And I hope that I actually use it more than just the once.

However - did you know that a BASKET OF PEACHES only makes approximately 2 glasses of peach juice?

2 glasses.

Not even big glasses.

So that's where my interest waned just a bit. Because dudes. That's a ALOT of work for 2 glasses of juice. (Did I mention that they're not even BIG glasses?)

However it does mean that Maddie now knows what pure peach juice tastes like. (Yes, I gave her some. Well actually Daddy gave her some. But seriously, what are we, torturers? To drink freshly squeezed juice in front of her like that?)

The verdict?

YUMMMMMMMMMMY!!!

The Monster is back.

xxoo.S

New theory

How to get your daughter to favour you again?

Write a blog post about it.

This weekend Miss M and I had seemed to find our groove again. She still wants Daddy a lot (oddly enough, whenever I'm telling her "no" to something - shocker, non?), but warmed back up to me so that I was feeling much less like an outsider.

Hi Parenting! Thanks for taking my self-esteem and kicking it into the neighbourhood of Teen-Angst Highschool Trauma. Good stuff...

Anyways - we had a fantabulous (yes, I just used that word) weekend. Sat morning we hit up Port Perry for a bit o' shopping and fun-playing at the water park, by the water. I also bought possibly the yummiest raspberries known to man from the farmer's market there. So good that I've eaten 2 full pints in less than 24 hours. Sat night was another bbq at a friends house, while the babies slept, the toddlers played and the adults chatted. I feel like every weekend is another post about me hosting/going to a bbq - we have become our parents...

Sunday afternoon was spent at "The Beach" in T.O.

Verdict: Maddie LOVES the beach, Hubby HATES the beach (well, the crowd of it all). Me? I like it - but give me the Sandbanks over the boardwalk any day of the week.

In other news - we won the Photo Friday Contest at Durham Region Baby! Big thanks to everyone that voted for us - and yay to new bags!!

Happy Monday peeps! Must go as am heading to Cambridge now for a big work preso ... in my $19 JOE dress. That's right. I'm fancy...

xxoo.S

Theoretically speaking

I was actually going to research, and link to sources, and quote and you know, try to write a post that sounded in some way investigated and unbiased.

Buuut, I don't really believe in trying to be something you're not.

So why don't you all just trust me on this one. LOTS OF EXPERTS say that it's normal for kids to go through stages where they favour one parent over the other.

Reasons include (and I'm totally paraphrasing the theories with my own annoyance - thanks for taking it all with a grain of salt...):

1. One parent is around more often (read "stay-at-home-mom-or-dad") and is therefore so available that they become boring and uninteresting compared to the other parent.
2. The child loves the one parent so much and feels so comfortable around him/her that they feel like they can be a complete asshole to said parent and nothing bad will really happen to their relationship.
3. Because of a new baby, jealousy could be playing a role (or the child is simply going to the parent that actually is available more often - pretty much the direct opposite of theory #1, above).
4. The child and the parent that is out of favour are speaking different "Love Languages" (dude, I can't MAKE this shit up).
5. One parent is busy doing things (like errands/chores and the like), while the other parent is not and plays with the child constantly, and therefore viewed as being more "fun" (I like to call this the "2 children in the house" theory).
6. It's just a stage. Your child will get over it. (This is the theory that invariably gets slapped on any situation where any of the above don't actually apply, or they do, but it's just so much easier to call it a "stage".)

However, since it's been a few months now that I've been spending time in the unfavoured parent camp, I figure I can offer a few theories of my own...

• The "Your child is a Libra, you are a Capricorn, your husband is an Aries" theory. This theory actually requires that a friend of mine explain it - because I don't remember why they are destined to get along so much better, or so much more easily. But they are. It's DESTINED.
• The "She's clearly a Daddy's Girl and you just need to have baby #2 and it will be a boy and then you'll have a child who likes you" theory. Um. This theory only works if I do, in fact, have a boy. And that boy doesn't actually want to play sports or do any of those other "male-bonding" things that boys like to do. Like fish. Or eat worms.
• The "Just wait until she wants to go shoe shopping and see who the favourite is then" theory. Will take a bit more time - but my money is definitely on this one...
• The "You're right, she doesn't really like you all that much" theory. Hmmmm - that's not really a theory, is it? Let's bottle that one back up in the little dark place it was hiding, shall we?
• The "Perhaps all you parents need to grow the F up and stop worrying about who your kid likes better" theory. This is actually the Hubby's theory. And he's usually wrong about stuff in general, soooo...
• The "If you'd just stop saying 'no' all the time, she might like you a bit more" theory. This one sounds promising. If I lived in a world where freezies were great dinner choices, throwing toys was acceptable, and so was slapping people.
• The "It really probably is just a stage, and she'll get over it soon" theory. The clear winner. It's a highly unique theory. Expect it to be the all the rage on parenting sites soon.

xxoo.S

Score one for modern medicine

Turns out it was strep after all. At least that's what I'm assuming as after only 2 days of antibiotics I'm already 215093480958345% better.

So I guess I won't be losing those 15 post-pregnancy-pounds that are sitting like a deflated tire around my midsection.

But it also means that I have energy to you know, breathe and stuff. I actually participated in Maddie's bedtime routine last night, for the first time all week.

It's all come just in time, as today is filled with meetings with VIP bossman, who is in town for his monthly visit. Let me tell you how fun it was preparing for today all week, whilst sick as a dog. Isn't timing awesome?

But once meetings are over, and now that my head isn't a gobbledygook of feverish induced random-non-related thoughts, I will post more interesting stuff. Like my theory of how spoiled kids become spoiled (because it's EASIER!). Or why toddlers choose to favour one parent over the other (Maddie HATES me). And my new philosophy on life (it's only two words - which are not "I'M AWESOME" but perhaps should be).

So tra-la for now peeps...

xxoo.S

The diet of the '90's

So the doctor thinks it's either strep or mono. Mono!!??

She asked me if I had ever had mono before and I was all proud to say that I had avoided it back in highschool when it swept through a bunch of my friends. And then I went - whoa - you think I have MONO?

Apparently, strep looks like mono, mono looks like strep. Until we get the test results back on the strep swab, we won't know for sure. In the meantime though, she gave me some antibiotics and said I could wait until I got the results, or just start taking them (as I'm not a sucker for punishment, I decided to fill the script asap).

Fun...

xxoo.S

Downfall of daycare

I've never been as sick, as often, as I have this past year. Since the start of daycare back in September of last year, I don't think our household has lasted longer than 4 weeks of without battling some kind of cold/flu/stomach sickness.

After Maddie's random strange sickness on Sunday, I am now the next to succumb apparently. It started yesterday, with aches and pains and general malaise. It has quickly escalated into full on sore throat, nausea and fever.

I'm at work today, but only for a few meetings and then heading to the doctor to see if we can nip this in the bud.

I realize that we either take the sickness now, or later, when Maddie starts school. But the procrastinator in me is thinking that later would have been so much better...

xxoo.S

Flutter

It was a quiet weekend, spending time as a family and of course Maddie fawning all over Daddy as if she couldn't quite believe he was home and that he was real, and OMG - HERE'S Daddy! I've been wondering where you went!

Since I was clearly a 3rd wheel, I spent most of Saturday afternoon at a girlfriend's house visiting with some friends and enjoying Brooklin Bakery carrot cake. I also may have been nursing a hangover from the bottle of bubbly Yellowtail that we opened at 11pm on Friday night. Seth was supposed to be home closer to 10ish, but of course his flight was delayed, and of course the 407 was closed... so we celebrated his return a little later than anticipated.

Sat night was a BBQ night regardless of the rain. Ribs + corn and mmmm-mmmmm down home goodness on the grill! We also learned that BFF's L & G have a baby that will sleep in the MIDDLE OF THE FLOOR. No need for playpens, no need for magical vibrating chairs or swings. Oh no, just give him a spot in a darkened living room and he'll just sleep there, thankyouverymuch.

Have I mentioned my jealousy over their Amazing Sleeping Baby?

Sunday was mega early as it was NOT my turn to sleep in. And Maddie was a grouch. And not feeling well herself. And a bit cuddly. And maybe a bit feverish? And whoa - that's vomit!

Blackberry vomit stains new pj's. Just putting that out there.

But after the vomitscapade, Maddie went to bed for a nap. 4 hours later she woke up. Right as rain. Happy as a clam. All sorts of metaphors and analogies of happiness.

Sidebar: how the heck do kids do that? Be totally fine and running around one minute. Then raging fever and vomiting the next minute. Then get some sleep and oopsy-daisy, we're fine again. WTF?

While Maddie was sleeping, I decided to check out the Brand! New! Kitchen Stuff Plus that opened just down the road. Oh KSP - how I have missed you. And now you're so expensively convenient...

I purchased many many frames for my photo endeavour (to suck a bit less at home décor). Now I just have to hang the frames. And print the photos. And yeah. I'll update you in a few more months on that one...

I also purchased the cutest little bit of fluff for Maddie's room. She's a girl. These are butterflies. I couldn't get more prosaic if I tried. But dammit. These are adorable and they were only $20 and whatevs...

xxoo.S

PS - Yes, the picture is fuzzy. I have a blackberry, not an iPhone. And so - well, I lose in the great race of picture quality. And we all know if I actually took the pic of her room with my camera that you'd NEVER see it... so here you go.

PPS - And also yes - the butterflies are flying up from her stinky diaper genie. That was for my own ironic amusement.

PPPS - For the record. Maddie thinks they are "pwetty pwetty budder-flab"s.

Highlights of my "Single Parent Week"

Edited to add:

While I was being facetious, none of my complaining about being a "single parent" this week was meant to make light of "real" single parents out there. Holy crap I can't even imagine. My mom raised me on her own for my first 2 years, and so I know (well, I've HEARD) just how hard it is. My week was nothing. I get it. But it's all relative, non? And what is hard for me could be a cakewalk for some of you. Just wanted to put that disclaimer out there. Carry on...

The higlights:

• We ate things that I don't usually buy b/c of the Hubs. Like vegetable lasagne. A lot of fish. Veggie/pesto/pasta. Um - that makes him sound like a big carnivore, doesn't it?
• We played outside every night and Maddie was super-awesome. We went for long bike-rides, she watched me cut the lawn, and never cried about coming back in. It's like she was on her best behaviour for me.
• I read a book until about 1am in bed. I sat in bed with my laptop reading blogs + catching up on emails until late one evening. I never get to sit in bed at night doing that stuff.
• My sleeping position quickly became the "starfish". Sleep was delicious with no snoring next to me.
  
• Speaking of sleep, Maddie slept in until 8:15 one morning. And it happened to be a morning when I hadn't set my alarm (with a toddler that wakes between 6:30 and 7am, who needs an alarm?)... so I got a great sleep in too.
• Overall, Maddie was totally awesome. I think she cut me some slack, which was much appreciated. And I only had to let her watch Elmo/Dora/Sesame about 5 trillion times.

And the lowlights?

• I yelled once - on the first day. She cried and I immediately apologized. I think that was the first time that I ever crouched down in front of her and apologized for being angry. She forgave me and gave me a big kiss. Then reminded me for the next hour "Mommy sorry!".
• I accidentally set off our house alarm 2 out of 5 mornings. I like to set the alarm when I'm alone in the house at night, it makes me feel safer. However I think I scared about 5 years off my cats' lives.
• Watching crappy summer tv alone is just no fun. There's no one there to listen to my outrageously witty remarks.

Overall - as lonely as it got - it was a bonding week for Miss M and I. And it also reminded me what it's like to miss the Hubs...

xxoo.S

Cake top

That's the word I've heard bantered around by other moms - in reference to our jelly bellies. That gorgeous, sexy, wonderful ROLL that hangs out all the way around those pre-preggo jeans that I refuse to throw away.

Young silly girls with their low-riders have muffin top. Us older ladies get cake top.

Dead sexy!

As Miss M is pushing 2 years old, it's time I thought about fixing this, non? I mean - I can't really blame it on the baby (or the breastfeeding) anymore, can I?

And before anyone wants to make the suggestion. No. I'm too cheap to buy new jeans. Too.Cheap.Full.Stop.

So before we decide to get me knocked up for #2, I figured it made sense to get back into shape. You know, so I can start the process all over again. I'm nothing if not productive...

I have promised myself to get some type of exercise equipment into my house before the end of August. Preferably an elliptical. Because have you seen my ass after a few weeks on the elliptical? Oh yeah baby...

And because I never do things in half measures, I'm also checking out a boot camp next Monday with a Babyville friend (see! exercise helps you lose weight AND make friends). I expect this boot camp will possibly destroy my enthusiasm and I will drag my ass home with my tail between my legs... but we can always hope that it will inspire some sort of inner-fitness-goddess.

xxoo.S

She speaks in sentences now

You can't see the forest for the trees.

Someone used to say that to me all the time (a teacher? can't remember, I'm only 33 and I have the memory of an 80 yr old)... because I'm a "detail-oriented person". It also means that I get easily caught up in the details of anything, and find it harder to see the "big picture".

That big picture these days is Maddie, becoming less and less a little baby and more and more a little kidlet.

I worry about whether she's had enough milk that particular day. Or if it's a bad thing that her poop is green (GREEN?!!). And whether a 3rd round of Elmo is really going to give her lasting brain-damage.

But it takes a visit from family, who haven't seen in her in over a month, to realize that um... she's speaking in full sentences now.

6 months ago I was worried she wasn't talking enough. That the words she used were great, but a bit repetitive (everything was "dat!"), and would the Average Joe actually understand her? You know - detailed stuff.

Now, she's not even 2 years old and she's practically giving dissertations on The Unbearable Lightness of Being. OR telling us, "Maddie go Mommy's car-car now." You know - po-tay-to, po-tah-to...

So yes, it was lovely to have it pointed out (by the always unbiased Grandparents) that our Miss M is a pure, unadulterated genius child.

But at the same time, disconcerting, because.... really? Am I that busy and distracted? How can I not notice that she has passed one of those great "developmental milestones" and is now speaking and conversing like a small little human being?

Is it a working mother thing? Bad mother thing? Normal mother thing?

Regardless, it motivated me to step back, and try to see that forest. Because, as she so eloquently put it this morning, "Maddie no baby Mommy! Maddie big girl."

Holy shit sugar pop. I guess you are.

xxoo.S

PS - I may be proud, but I don't have to like it. How can a 22 month old not be a baby anymore? Isn't the whole point that you're still COUNTING THEIR AGE IN MONTHS? Isn't that the litmus test of whether or not they are still, indeed, a baby? Dammit. I've become a cliché...

I should be sleeping right now

But I'm not, because I have the bed to myself and therefore am currently ensconced with my laptop reading through a week's worth of unread rss feeds.

I should be sleeping though, as I expect this week is going to threaten my sanity slightly. I'm playing single mom, while the hubs is in NJ for business. All week long. On a long weekend. No, I'm not bitter.

Trust me, I know it will be nice having some girly-girl time with Miss M tomorrow. I think a bike-ride, some pool time and a bit of shopping is on the agenda. We've spent the better part of the weekend outside already, with the in laws, playing in the yard and erecting a lovely shed. Damn, the excitement of suburbia...

My other goal for tomorrow is some photo organization and printing. Because, as I think I've said before, I'm absolute shite at keeping on top of my photo printing... and aside from the never ending guilt of my terrible prowess as a mother (and keeping a digital record of my kidlet's every accomplishment), I actually took a closer look at my house recently and thought, huh, perhaps I should, you know... decorate. We've lived here for 2 years and I have exactly 2 pictures on display. Maddie's hospital pic and our wedding pic. So I've made the resolution to suck a little less, and get some photos in some frames and thrown up on the walls.

In future posts about me sucking less as a homemaker... expect to see: wallpapering of a washroom, refinishing of cupboards, and installation of some wainscoting.

xxoo.S