Easter weekend

I have so many blog posts rattling around in my head, but can't seem to really get any down on paper (er, on keyboard...post...whadeva).  

So instead you get a post about our past weekend.  Easter weekend.  Maddie's second Easter weekend.

Last year I didn't get her anything.  Never was a big fan of Easter (maybe as a kid, but even then I didn't like chocolate all that much, yes you heard me right), so maybe that's why it didn't register as a "must-do" holiday on my radar.  But even so - it does seem like I was a bit of a Scrooge last year to not get her a single thing.  I'll be blogging about my theory on some of the why's a bit later.  In the meantime, we can just think I was a b*tch...

Anywho - this isn't about last year, it's about this year.  And this year, I was an awesome mom.  A mom that has been slowly stocking up for about a month.  For an 18-month old that has no flipping clue who this purported Easter bunny is, and why he's so exciting.  My hit rate on the gifts was about 50%...The playdoh in egg cups!  Not exciting.  The My Little Pony with bunny ears!  Couldn't care less.  The adorably soft little lamb!  Meh.  But the truck?  Or the bubbles?  Or the Smarties?  Oh yessir - they were a hit.

So that was Sunday morning.  And the resulting sugar high from the early-morning Smarties resulted in a late-morning crash nap for Miss Maddie that lasted until almost 1pm.  And the rest of the afternoon was spent on the couch watching the Masters.  Oh wait, that wasn't me... Right - and the rest of the afternoon was spent doing laundry, and sorting out goodwill clothes, and reorganizing closets, and avoiding nap-deprived-meltdowns.  Yeah, that's what we did.

The rest of the weekend before that is now just a bit of a blur.  Thurs night was supposed to be an exciting, fun date night in the city and we failed with a capital "F" to make it happen.  Friday we took advantage of the weather to break ground for our veggie garden.  Saturday Seth spent most of the day recovering from food poisoning, and I spent out at a babyshow + buying plants from the nursery.

That's it in a nutshell.  Very uneventful.  But relaxing.  And rejuvenating.  And just a nice family weekend.  

xxoo.S

Happy Easter from Maddie

xxoo.S

It must be frustrating

To be a toddler.  There's so much going on in their brains.  They understand a tonne, but can't verbalize it.

I reasoned with Maddie tonight.  I told her she had to finish her lasagne in order to get any more tomatoes (she would eat nothing but cherry tomatoes if we let her - don't worry, I realize it could be a lot worse).  We counted down the forkfulls together.  She got it, you know?

So if she can really understand that much, how frustrating must it be to not be able to make others understand you all the time.  And I can tell Maddie has so much to say.  In happy times, she's babbling away (NONstop - like seriously, we are so in trouble when she can speak).  In sad times and she's upset about something and can't get me to understand why.  Or in mad times.  To be honest, I usually know what she's mad about - but I'm sure it's frustrating to her when she's mad and wants to yell more directly at me.

So there I was, sitting there at the dinner table, kind of marvelling at it all.  Imagine the patience it must take.  It's kind of like someone coming to Canada that doesn't speak English.  You have to admire the patience it takes to keep trying, getting words wrong, having people shaking their heads at you, not understanding what you're saying, and you just keep at it.

Sorry for the ramble.  But kinda cool.  When you think about it.

xxoo.S

Weekend pics

Maddie & Simon fighting over Maddie's new chair.  Love how Si is all nonchalant, like, "Dude.  I'm totally not moving.  I'm old and I'm lazy and my commitment to lazing around kicks your attention span's ass.  Now move it along, young lady."

Maddie wears pigtails!  If any of you out there can resist my little girl in pigtails, I seriously contest your humanity.

This was Sunday.  Look!  Sun.  Sand.  Enjoyment.  Balmy compared to today.  Go away, Winter.

xxoo.S

Diagnosis

Another first for Maddie, but not a fun one.  Her first ear infection.

I guess it's kind of amazing that she's made it to 18 months without getting one yet - seems like everyone I know has gone through this at much a younger age.

Apparently her ears are only a bit red (although she SCREAMED when the doctor put the flashlight thingy in there), so the infection isn't severe.  But she's on antibiotics.  

So there you go.  We have our diagnosis and our medication.  I'm just praying for a good sleep for her tonight.

xxoo.S

Dead tired

Maddie celebrated her Grandparents' Vallier visit with a big case of s.i.c.k.  What has been a chesty cough on and off last week turned into a sucky, grumpy, fever-ish baby as of Saturday afternoon.  

Because she responded so well to the Tylenol each time and she was really chewing on her fingers, I kept thinking that perhaps the whole sickness could be chalked up to that last damn molar coming through.

Then she spent 4 hours awake last night.  Oh yes, from 10:30-2:30.  4 hours.  Awake.  Nothing worked.  Baby Tylenol.  Infant Motrin.  Orajel.  Warm bottle.  Cold bottle.  Cold compress.  Dancing in Mommy's arms.  Being rocked in Daddy's arms.  Lying in the bed with us.

Nothing worked.

I ended up letting her cry for a bit, hoping that if anything, it would tire her out to the point that she'd just fall asleep.

Nope.

And so I rocked.  And I sang.  And I cheated and turned the iPod on.  And I rubbed her back.  And I played with her hair.  And ohmygod does my back hurt from leaning over the crib.

She finally fell asleep and stayed that way until about 7am.  At which point she was feverish but happy.

More tylenol.  Some breakfast cajoling.  And lots and lots of JUICE!

She went to daycare this morning, but was starting to fever again when I called to check in, so I've picked her up - she's sleeping at the moment and we have a dr's appt at 3:15.  

I know this sounds bad, but I hope it's something.  As in something diagnosable and treatable.  As in - something that we can quantify and medicate.  As in something other than, "oh it's just a virus that needs to run it's course" because damn!  Bad timing with a week packed with work presentations and off-site meetings and downtown meetings and conference calls and, and, and...

Anyone have a spine I can borrow?

xxoo.S

Cheap cheap cheap!

In honour of all the cute, fuzzy, yellow chicks I've been seeing lately in the Easter-riffic advertising, I thought today's blog post should be dedicated to my secret persona.

I'm a cheap-ass-ho-motha@#(*$&!

Classy, right?  

To give you a bit of a background - one of my mom's favourite sayings while I was growing up was, "You have champagne tastes and a beer pocketbook."  I grew up with lots of hand-me-down clothes.  It wasn't strange to me that our house was filled with used furniture.  And we ate leftovers better than any family I've ever heard of.

I'm pretty sure I wasn't in love with the idea of hand-me-down clothes by the time I hit my pre-teens, but I can totally appreciate the concept now.  Kids grow, right?  Like, fast and stuff.  Which is why I continue to pledge my allegiance to the local Once Upon a Child - they rock my world and keep my kid un-nekkid.

And to be honest, as I was growing up, I don't remember even noticing that our furniture wasn't all-brand-new-all-the-time!  Or is this just a new phenomena in our materialistic-driven society?  

Regardless, I have really fond memories of working with my mom on refinishing lots of pieces of furniture.  Old dressers and end tables that we got gifted by friends or family members.  Using (what I'm sure was highly-toxic) paint remover and sanding and staining and varnishing.  It doesn't take talent, just an eye for detail and some elbow grease.  

I still have a few dressers in my house that are older than my grandmother, and that I can look at and remember finishing when I was like 11 years old.  (Whoa Mom, slave labour!)  One of these is actually ear-marked to be going through some more refinishing this summer, as part of the "spare bedroom overhaul" project that's residing in the back of my mind.

And leftovers?  Don't even get me started on this.  I don't mind leftovers.  In fact (even more so nowadays), I APPRECIATE leftovers.  Lots of things taste yummier after a few days in the fridge (chili - I 'm looking at you, here).  And the time-savings of eating already prepared food for dinner?  I'm like, in awe of appreciation when I can pull that kind of rabbit out of the hat.

But the hubby and several good friends often look at me sideways, like I'm a freaky depression-era reincarnation, when I mention the coolness of leftovers.  Wasters...

So what's the point of this rant?  Well, I was telling someone recently about my latest blog discovery, The Thrifty Chicks,  that I am currently obsessed with.  And this "someone" responded with, "Wow, you're a real Couponer now, aren't you?".  

First of all, I had to explain that reading about (or buying from) thrift stores has nothing to do with couponing.  And secondly, what the hell is wrong with coupons?

Apparently by Couponer, she meant that I go and on about deals here, and savings there, and you do this for that $, and garage sales and etc etc etc.  So it's a blanket concept.  You can be cheap and price match, or price compare or shop only sales - and you're labelled as a "Couponer".  Doesn't mean that you're obsessed only with coupons.  

Perhaps the politically incorrect term would be cheapskate?  Tightwad?

Whadeva.

I don't blame the economy, I think I've always been down with gooooood deals.  And if a struggling economy means stores are pushing sales and coupons, or it means lots of people are looking for extra $$$ and selling stuff (check out kijiji.ca for kids outdoor toys - WHY would you buy full price when you've got these options?) - well don't we all benefit?

And maybe it's because I am now a "Couponer", but there seems to be a huge resurgence towards old becoming new again.  I feel no shame in telling people about the great deals I got on things, that are in fact, second-hand.  Maybe you're a "Couponer" when you show pride in your frugality?

As I said.  Whadeva.  I am a Couponer.  Hear me roar (and $$$$ave)!

xxoo.S

I think her head grew

All of a sudden none of Maddie's hoodies fit her anymore.  Granted, she's worn most of these hoodies for months now.  But still, it's like she got up one morning and her head grew five sizes.

Dude.  I guess this means I have to go shopping now...

xxoo.S

Maddie dances

The weekend in bullets

• I got to spend Sat afternoon with girlfriends I haven't seen in a while - doing the lunch thing at Yonge/Eg.
• Daddy & Maddie spent the afternoon together, doing the park/outside thing - Seth got a few good vids that I'll get around to uploading at some point.
• Sat night was spent with good friends G&L, doing an early celebration for Seth's bday.  Steak, scallops, shrimp and ceasar salad - yum.
• Sunday was spent... um, not feeling well after the copious amounts of red wine imbibed the night before.  
• Oh, and Maddie spent lots more time with Daddy this weekend than usual (since I was either out of the house or very slow moving).  Which meant she was in a better than usual mood.  Daddy's girl [said with a grin]...

That's all.

xxoo.S

Spring Cleaning

Does anyone do this anymore?  I remember as a child, my mom was a Spring-Cleaning-Fanatic.  I was charged with washing baseboards, sorting and putting away my "winter" clothes, and washing windows every April.  

I haven't sorted out clothes by season in ages, but have always done a spring and fall muck through our wardrobes to do the Goodwill toss.  And as our drawers are getting difficult to close again, it would seem we're at this stage again.

But aside from the obvious (cleaning, sorting, organizing), I haven't really thought about what spring cleaning means now that we're homeowners (yes we were homeowners last year, but were a bit lost in the fog of having an under-one-year-old).

It's become glaringly obvious that our windows need washing.  And because we have wooden windowsills (that people keep telling me we're "lucky" to have now that vinyl is the standard - I continue to dispute that point), Seth has the lucky job this summer of sanding down the peeling paint and re-painting all the exteriors.

And the other day while sorting through some papers and whatnot, I rediscovered the "home guide" the previous homeowners had left for us.  Quite a handy guide actually, it gives you a checklist for each month of certain things to do... you know, change air filters, get ducts cleaned, routine checks on appliances - all SORTS of things that we have NOT been doing over the past 2 years of residence here.

So as the weather gets warmer and the to-do list is getting longer and longer and cluttering up my brain, my goal for this weekend is now to simply get a game-plan organized for us.  What we want to accomplish this summer - projects we think we can tackle, renos and repairs that need to be done and the fun seasonal things (like planting a vegetable garden!) that I really want to happen.

I expect we'll have far loftier expectations of things that can get done.  But I figure it's smart to get the hubby involved in the actual list creation, so maybe he'll feel ownership over getting some of the things done?  Yes?  Hopefully?  

We'll see...

xxoo.S

PS - any hints on starting a garden from scratch?  I'm planning on taking the shortcut of planting seedlings instead of just seeds.  But should I go rent a rototiller?  Or just digging up the ground will be enough?  And what's the best option for the "walls" of the garden?  I really have no idea.

Bring on the core strength!

I've decided that, while I'm not ready to ramp up the gym membership (no time, no energy, and did I mention, no time?), I've earned myself the right to sign up for A class. Just one. One little itty bitty class that hopefully will light the fire under my butt and get me more interested in getting back in shape.

Or at least stop my hip from aching like I'm 78 years old when I get up from sitting on the floor with Maddie...

So I've signed up for a local Pilates class. I'm quite stoked about it (can I be 33 and use the word "stoked"?)... It will be Sat mornings (or Wed evening - depending on which class fills up to when she decides to hold it) and just around the corner from my house.

To celebrate, I will be purchasing a yoga mat this weekend at Fitness Depot - who, incidentally, is having a Women's Weekend event on Saturday and Sunday. Free seminars, contests + stuff for women!

xxoo.S

Sentimental

I've been feeling super-sentimental lately, and I don't know what's bringing it all on (no, Grandmamas - I'm NOT pregnant, so quit getting excited). Is it that all of a sudden our little bean is no longer a baby anymore? That's she's a chatty, busy little toddler? A whole entire other person with opinions and personality and did I mention, opinions?

Or is the whole, "should we have another kid? If yes, when? If no, why not?" discussion starting to leak out of my head and more into my heart. Making me pine for the baby-moments again. I caught myself watching home videos of Maddie the other day and wishing I could go back to those early days of motherhood. When we weren't rushed all the time. When a busy day was filled with me getting to the grocery store AND getting some laundry done. It was only a year ago, but feels like decades to me - when things were much slower and far less stressful.

Maybe it's because I realize that regardless of whether we have another little one or not, I'll never have those days again. The "sleep when they sleep", cuddle on the couch and watch tv at 4am, knowing you can just make up the sleep later in the day. Because (from what I've heard), two kids are infinitely harder than just one. There would be no sleeping during the day whenever the baby sleeps, as a little Miss Button would be running around all over the place. And what about those "difficult" days? How do you keep your sanity with a grumpy toddler and a screaming baby? I seriously doubt my ability in keeping it together during such a time.

Oh I know I know, the benefits way outweigh the costs... but it just seems so hard, you know?

But then begs the question - how do you know when you should have another? I know there's no magical time for age distance. There's pros and cons... less than 2 years means you (likely) have to worry about two in diapers, but they will be close playmates, around 2.5 years means you (likely) only have to worry about diapers for the baby, but have to deal with a older child that doesn't nap so when the hell do you rest? And >3 years, will they even like each other, much less be close?

It really was so much easier when we were sure that we were just going to have one...

xxoo.S

Karma's a bitch

I used to snicker, roll eyes, do all sorts of juvenile things behind the backs of young parents (usually dads) that I worked with because they were aaaaalllllllllllways sick.

Well, Karma always knows just how to bite you in the ass, doesn't she?  

Yup - I'm sick again.  And Maddie woke up a few times last night for no apparent reason (other than, as I suspect, she felt crappy and wanted to be cuddled a bit).

Bleh.

xxoo.S

March break hiatus

Our new daycare was on hiatus over March break, which meant we had to line up the Grandmama's for some babysitting duties.  Seth's mom came up from Sun to Wed, and my Mom came up from Wed to Sun.  It was a full house, let me tell you!

Luckily for Grandma V, the weather was gorgeous at the beginning of the week, so she and Maddie spent a lot of time at the park - which Maddie loved as well.  Maddie now goes down the slides on her own with ease (as long as someone's there to catch her at the bottom) - now we just have to work on her climbing back up on her own now too.

The latter half of the week was not as warm, so in sympathy for my mom (because have YOU ever spent 12 hours in a house with a toddler that wants to go 'side, 'side, 'side??), I took them both to the indoor play gym in Whitby on Friday morning.  Maddie was the most outgoing I've ever seen her there.  

I think any of my worries about her being the quiet, shy, wallflower that I was as a child are easing off.  This kid LOVES other kids and gets right in there to play.  In fact, it's funny as a (still secretly shy) parent to watch this, because I keep inwardly cringing, hoping the other kids won't reject her, that she's not being too overly-friendly, and her feelings won't get hurt etc etc etc, and HOLY PROJECTING, right?

On the weekend we visited my mom's aunt in a nearby nursing home and again, Maddie had her "charm" set on high.  She was chatty and smiley and couldn't stop staring at everyone.  It was almost embarrassing, except I saw how incredibly happy it made them, so I just let her go for it.  On a side note though?  It's hard to visit a place like this - it was my first time since highschool when we did a "adopt an old person" project or something like that.  Especially on a Saturday as you see the hopeful look in someone's eye that you could be there to visit them and I don't know - it just makes you feel guilty that you're not, and that perhaps you should stop and chat for a bit, but there's so many of them, and (see above) I'm not the most chatty, outgoing person in the world with strangers, so it's all just so awkward.  And sad.  And ugh, that's all I have to say about that.

Our Saturday afternoon was far more light-hearted - as we had friends stop by for a visit, with her 3.5 year old daughter.  I was worried that perhaps Maddie's toys would be too "junior" for her or that the girls wouldn't be able to play together because of the age difference.  Apparently I worried for nought - they had a blast chasing each other around and screeching.  

We topped the weekend off with a night out for Seth and I to drinks + a movie.  And here's another sidebar - what the HELL is with movies starting at 11pm these days.  Seriously - we either went to the 7:30/8:00 show.  Or we went to the 10:45(!!!!!!!) show.  Um, is there no happy medium?  Am I officially old now?  Who in the world is going to a 10:45 show?  Because if I'm going out for dinner and drinks, I'd be looped by 10:45.  No way I'd be able to sit and watch a movie.  What happened to the 9:00 showtimes?  Where did they go?  Because 9:00?  A LOT more convenient to have a few drinks and appys before the movies.  Hell, if you plan it right, you could actually fit dinner in nicely.  So instead, we had a quickie appetizer and a few pints at the nearby pub.  It was rushed - but even in the hour that we had prior to the movie, it was nice to just chat and be on a "date".  

Last few thoughts...

• A full week of Grandma help while daycare is on spring-break hiatus is MORE than welcome (as is the cooking of dinners every night before we got home from work!!!)
  
• The resulting spoiled little girl that pouts and gives me the death glare anytime I tell her to not do anything is not welcome.  Go away, please.  Now.
• Maddie peed in the potty again last night!  After peeing in 4 (FOUR!) separate spots on the carpet in the hallway.  Still, I was totally chuffed.
• We've won an inordinate amount of free coffees from Roll up the Rim.  Apparently that's why we never won anything before - all the winning cups are in Brooklin...

xxoo.S

I'm jealous

A good friend of mine is currently considering, seriously considering, not returning to work when her maternity leave ends.

And this isn't the first time a friend (or acquaintance, or random stranger in a bookstore) has told me about her thoughts on the topic. It happens a helluva lot more than I ever had thought it did.

When I was younger, cutting my teeth on the corporate ladder, I worked in a "boys club" and listened to coworkers talk about a woman on mat leave in the past tense. Past tense people. As if she's dead. Not just on leave - but never-to-return-again. And it was always a point of curiosity for me. Back then, I was in my mid-twenties. Waiting (im)patiently for a ring on my finger, but in no way feeling those maternal urges. So the thought of having kids was so far off my radar, the thought of not (gasp!) returning to work after mat leave was unfathomable. What do you mean, not return? Who do these women think they are, if not defined by their careers!?!

I was naive. But at least I was admittedly so. And I remember chit-chatting w/ the CFO about a recent co-worker who had gone on leave. "If so-and-so comes back, then we'll have to figure out x-y-z." ... I was like, hold up. What do you mean if she comes back. She's coming back. She's a VP. She's important. She likes her job. She's good at it. And she makes all that money!!!

And I remember so very clearly, how Mr. CFO looked at me with pity in his eyes, "I wouldn't just assume so-and-so is coming back - she probably won't. In fact, that's the assumption we're working on right now [as they make incredibly important departmental decisions]."

Sidebar: yes, I'm aware how HORRIBLY politically-incorrect it is for a CFO to chat w/ a subordinate about how another executive is probably not coming back, that the company is essentially planning on her not to return, and that it contravenes all sorts of legal and moral boundaries, yadda yadda yadda - I told you - it was a boy's club - and a loosey-goosey one at that.

Then I grew up (a bit). Got married. Turned 30. Started to hear the tick-tick-ticking of my biological clock and next thing you know, I'm knocked up.

Around that time, I had moved on and was now working at a girls-club instead - employee base of about 95% female with a few gay men thrown in for fun. So instead of talking behind my back and making assumptions, I was just asked outright - "So, are you coming back?"

I'm not kidding you. My boss, other executives, subordinates - it didn't matter who - they all felt like they could just ask me this. And again, I kept hearing, "Most women don't come back, you know."  I just scoffed it off - this was me.  I lurrrrrrve working.  I am a career-woman - hear me roar.

Fast-forward to the end of last summer and the final days of my mat leave. Where I was starting to feel that anxious, lead-hearted feeling of having to return to work. A return that needed to happen financially, but would also include a commute that would take me away from my baby girl for about 12 hours a day. Factor in her 11 hour sleep schedule, and that left me with about 1 hour of face-time each day.

It wasn't a good feeling. And so I started to explore my options... 1) Not returning (not an affordable option for our household). 2) Returning to existing job (aka "sucking it up"). 3) Returning to a different job.

#2 is what I opted for in the end (as option #3 was yielding zero possibilities). And in my discussion of exploring options for returning (I pitched work-from-home ideas, flex hours etc. etc. etc.), I eventually agreed to a consulting role in a sub-contract position.

Which then resulted in a different consulting gig, which resulted in a part-time gig at a different company (where I could work from home on flex hours), which has since resulted in a super-amazing promotion and increase to full-time commitment, but still having flex hours.

Long story short - I'm a lucky gal and it worked out well for me.  

But the experience has opened my eyes and I understand now how these women don't return.  Or they do, but in a different capacity.  Or sadly, they return and hate every minute of it.  I get how priorities shift - oh how priorities shift... That has been an experience for me - I figured I knew myself, and then whammo - my self changed.  

But I digress - this post wasn't about me.  It was about me marvelling that as much as things change, things still stay the same.  And while there's more women out in the work force than ever, how there's more dual-income families than ever ... it's still normal, okay, and in fact coveted* sometimes, to be a SAHM.  

And in a way, I'm totally jealous of my friend.  That she has the choice at all. 

xxoo.S

PS - what a rambling post, huh?  Sorry 'bout that.  I had more to say than I thought I did...

*Disclaimer for current employers should they decide to read this: This isn't me!  I don't covet it.  I love my job.  I love working.  I don't want to be a SAHM.  I promise!  It's the truth - I swear!

Happy St Patrick's Day from Maddie!

xxoo.S

Flying bullets

• I did it.  I finally bit the bullet and cut bangs.  I figure I'm going to last about two nanoseconds with this crazy long hair once summer hits - so to fully embrace and enjoy my long hair, I've done the bang chop.  I know it's only teasing to post to you about it, and not include a pic, but I'm at work and think they may think I'm crazy if I whip out my bb and take a picture of myself right here and now.  Later, soon, I promise...
• It's March break - and our daycare is closed.  So my mom and Seth's mom are taking turns visiting and taking care of Miss Button this week.  Which brings me to...
• Maddie hates me.  And that's because Grandma (V) is in town.  And she's far cooler and far more interesting the boring old mommy.  And perhaps Grandma spoils her, just a bit... Seriously though?  The 'tude I get copped when Grandma's around?  Not the coolest aspect of the visit.  Notthatwedon'tappreciatethehelp!!!  Honest...
• Spring is officially here - at least in Ontario - and we've been outside constantly.  Or as Maddie calls it "Side".  We go 'side to the park.  To the swings.  Around the block to the recent open house (I'm nosy).  To get the mail.  And just up and down the street to walk.  This summer is going to be so much fun...
• I am on the lookout for a climbing-sliding-thingamagoo.  I should keep an eye out on Kijiji, but really it's just making me antsy as I can't wait for garage sale season!!  Yes, I'm okay with admitting it.  It's a sport, and I'm still a bit of a rookie.  But I've got one full season under my belt and can't wait for the frost to leave, April to start and my Saturday mornings to fill up...

xxoo.S

Inspired

Lately there seems to be a resurgence into the hand-made world of crafting. Is it simply where my path (both online and off) is taking me? Or is it the current state of the economy that is inspiring more and more to save money and make more themselves?

I know I've been all about clipping coupons, cutting corners, getting discounts, asking for more discounts, and just generally trying to be more fiscally responsible. Less materially gluttonous... does that make sense?

Seth recently told me he wants to try and make Maddie a table & chair set instead of us buying her one - so instead of some golf paraphernalia he's getting a handier bday present from me this year. (And no, I'm not worried about ruining the surprise, he never reads this blog anyways...)

Beyond Seth's delve into handiwork, I too have projects lined up to do this spring - starting with resurfacing and staining our bathroom cupboards. Moving onto finishing Maddie's (a.k.a. guest bathroom) in a fun kid-friendly theme, and of course FINALLY finishing off the guest room. But that's more reno work - not really what I mean by "hand-made".

Just this morning as I was day dreaming about spring shopping for Miss Maddie and thinking about all the gorgeous little summer dresses I would buy her, I stumbled across the thought - hey, I could make those dresses...

And dude - I totally could! Her dresses from last summer were adorably simple. And smock dresses or jumpers would be perfect for her this spring. (PS - how adorable, but also young does she look here. It's like I barely remember her like this and that makes me feel so old, and sad, and wistful, and maybe a bit misty, and shuddup...)

So yeah - that's me. Going to Fabricland (Fabricland!) this weekend to buy some fabric and some patterns and I'm gonna make my girl some purty dresses. Well, make with the help of Grandma - who, oh so conveniently will be spending some time up here next week. I will be her grasshopper - she will teach me. And Maddie will look adorable.

I'll be sure to keep you updated on just how crafty I turn out to be. Might not be all that impressive. But damn, I will get an A for effort...

xxoo.S

No means yes?

We had a blissful couple of months where Maddie said "yesh" to just about anything you'd ask her. Blissful.

I don't know if it's a developmental change, or influences at this new daycare, but we've joined the rest of the world (at least from what I'm told) and now have a toddler who's favourite word is "nawwww" (that's NO with a full-on drawl because apparently my daughter is also from Kentucky)...

And for a while it was exasperating, because seriously dude? A little too much negativity coming at you when every question, every statement, every loving little cuddle gets you a "nawww".

Now I've found my sense of humour, and am just finding it amusing.

"Maddie, do you want strawberries?" (her very favourite food in-the-whole-wide-world)

"Nawww."

"Maddie, do you want to watch your show?" (either Sesame or Big Comfy Couch - don't ask)

"Nawww."

But she clearly does. She wants the damn strawberries. She wants to watch her shows. She wants the juice she just asked for 2 minutes ago. And so and so forth.

My question is - what the hell are you supposed to do here? I feel like giving her what I know she actually wants, even thought she's saying no, makes zero sense and is just confusing the issue with her.

Does she "get" that no means no? Or is no just the word du jour and means absolutely nothing? Because just a few weeks ago she understood the concept of yes and no. So why not now? What's her issue dammit!?!?!?

and breathe

So perhaps I haven't totally found my sense of humour about it. But it's frustrating. And I don't really know how to act. Because if I do the opposite of the above (by listening to her "no" and not giving her what I know she wants), I then get to experience her newly-honed toddler meltdown skillz to the nth degree.

So yeah. I have no idea. For now I'm just ignoring her "naw" and doing what I want anyway.

Does that mean I'm a real grown up now?

xxoo.S

A Maddie Moment

Getting dressed this morning:

Me: "And here's your socks", as I start pulling them over her feet.

Maddie: "Shawks!"

After getting the "shawks" on, I start undoing the buttons on her cardigan so I can slip that on.

Maddie: "Nawwww!!! Thooos! Thooos! THOOOOOOS!!!!" As she starts frantically doing sit ups while simultaneously sticking her feet as near my face as humanly possible, just in case I don't get the point.

Seth: "Wow, she really knows what she wants. I guess you don't change the order up much?"

Me: "Guess not."

Maddie: "Thooos! Pwetty-pwetty-pwetty!"

Seth: "She's really starting to take after you, huh?"

I'm not sure if that was a comment on her obsession with shoes, or obsession with routine. But yeah, I'd say she is starting to take after me...

xxoo.S

I want to shop there

I admit it, I have a shedload of blogs that I keep track of in my Reader - the list has just grown organically over the years, and probably really exploded while I was on mat leave. Some of the blogs are interior design (yeah yeah, who do I think I am? No one - I promise. I just like to be inspired and be able to rip off ideas on the cheapcheapcheap), and of course there are about a trillion mommy blogs in the list, and a few other shopping ones.

Add that to my addiction to e-newsletters from all the major retailers (partly for professional reasons, partly for, well, it's like window shopping, okay?)... anyways it gets a little frustrating. Frustrating because I see these really super-cool things that I should be able to buy. I want to be able to buy.

But I can't. Because I'm a Canadian Resident...

And while I totally love the idea of shopping Canadian, sometimes I just want to shop at Tar-gé (that's a whiny voice in case the italics weren't clear enough).

If you are a U.S. resident, you have the world (of shopping) at your fingertips. The selection! The free shipping! The deals/steals/way-cheaper-than-most-of-our-stuff! Have I mentioned the deals?

It's hard when I get a Piperlime emailer and they're promoting these really awesome peep-toe Calvin's at a ridiculous price. And. I. Can't. Find. Them. Anywhere. In. This. Country.

Or I hear about a deal Home Depot is doing on flooring installation - $139 for any room. And I get our local flyer and it's the same deal - only it's $199.

Exchange rates. I get it. Ridiculous shipping rates because our country has lovely wide open spaces and it's hard to get things to people etc etc etc. I get that too.

But just give me the option!!! Make it inhibitively expensive to ship here - I still think those companies would be shocked/surprised/delighted at the number of orders they'd get by the selection-starved Cdn market.

Okay, that was my whiny post of the month. Roll your eyes and get back to work now, thanks.

xxoo.S

How to...host a damn good baby shower

Kidding... sort of.

Yes, this weekend was the much-anticipated baby shower for my BFF, Liz. I had been preparing for weeks - even though I had sub-contracted much of it (desserts, favours, games - all outsourced!).

My proudest accomplishment was the diaper cake I made - it was really fun to make and I think it was a great centerpiece for the table. Other cool ideas I found online? Instead of using streamers, put up clotheslines and hang baby items (socks, onesies, booties etc) and using soothers as napkin holders (yeah, I didn't actually do this, because paper napkins are just not that pretty rolled up).

It was fun party. There were over 25 women in my family room/kitchen and it was crowded (and HOT). The food was well-received. The gifts were more than plentiful. And we made my friend wear a hat made out of bows. Oh yeah - the humiliation of it all...

In family news - Maddie is officially recovered from the HFMD, she still has a bit of a rash, but it's dried up, not contagious anymore. She's back at daycare today, and things are pretty much back to normal.

Yay for normal.

xxoo.S

Quarantined

HFMD.

That stands for Hand Foot Mouth Disease. And that is officially what Maddie has. (Well not really officially, as the doctor at the Urgent Care Centre couldn't confirm 100% as she doesn't have the rash symptoms in the textbook places - argh, don't even get me started...)

Anyways - HFMD is characterized by a blistery rash on...you guessed it! The afflicted's hands, feet and inside their mouth. Other symptoms include sore throat, fever, malaise, and vomiting.

As I've posted in the past couple of days, poor Button has had all of these symptoms, plus a terrible rash in her diaper region and around the outside of her mouth.

It was the daycare provider that caught it. Because she seemed like she was getting better, Maddie attended daycare yesterday, and after her nap, while changing her diaper, Annette saw that she had blisters all over her tongue. And since Annette's daughter had a bout of HFMD several years ago, she had the "ah-ha!" moment. Apparently the onset of the sickness with her daughter also started with crazy vomiting/fever and then resulted in a rash 36 hours later.

So, while the doctor couldn't say for certain, I think we've verified ourselves that she definitely has it. And the fun part is only beginning. She was up EVERY. HOUR. last night, unable to sleep. That was fun. And she refuses anything that isn't milk or yoghurt (or vanilla ice cream that I treated her with this morning).

I feel awful for her, but honestly admire how much of a trooper she is. When she's awake, she's still playing and acting her normal self, just a little more tired than usual and perhaps a bit more irritable. (As for me? I'm A LOT more irritable. I need me some sleep.)

Isn't it amazing how kids can just play through a sickness? It's like because they can't verbalize the complaints, they shrug them off far more easily than we do as adults. Funny little runts.

Anyways - we have a busy weekend ahead of us - big baby shower hostess time, with several out-of-town guests staying with us. And with Maddie quarantined from daycare today, I'm really only able to work while she's sleeping. I guess I'll catch up on my sleep next weekend...

xxoo.S

Maddie Milestone

Tonight before her bath, Miss Button peed in the potty for the very first time!!!

Trust me, I don't think that this means we're in any way shape or form, starting "official" potty training territory. But the fact that she "gets it" is just so cool.

xxoo.S

Wayback flashback

As I posted earlier today, Miss Button has been sick these past 24 hours. Last night it was fast and furious vomiting, followed by falling asleep on my chest in an exhausted stupor. Follow that up with a full night of wakeups and crying and being unable to sleep and wanting one of us to hold her.

She woke up today much like her old self and has been fine in keeping everything down, but she's very sucky and wants to be held a lot. She'll even just lay on the bed next to you to have a little rest.

To be honest - today she was more like the baby she was a year ago - cuddly and snuggly and wanting to sleep only in someone's arms. It was kind of a nice flashback.

And I'm exhausted...

xxoo.S

Irony is...

Having to email your boss and tell him you'll be staying home with your sick daughter in the very first week of getting paid for "full time" designation in your job.

xxoo.S

PS - yes, seems like another bout of stomach flu has hit Miss Button. She vomited 5 times in a 45 minute period right after picking her up from daycare last night. It isn't the same bug as before, as she didn't seem bothered by the vomiting last time, whereas she was hysterically upset about it this time, and fell asleep for an hour in my arms like a newborn when she was done, from the pure exhaustion of the effort I think. Poor Button...

And we've hit yet another developmental stage. A stage that I thought we had ducked, with Maddie's (until recently) preference to the word, "yeshhhh".

Instead that was just a teaser, and we were just a little slower to get here. Maybe a result of daycare influence? Who knows. But ask Miss Button a question these days, and the answer invariably is, "Nooo".

It's almost amusing. Almost.

I get now, all those comments and things I read about how the negativity of having every question answered as a "no" gets grating after a while. If I'm in a good mood it's amusing. If I'm annoyed, well, it's annoying.

In other news, I think she's hit a growth spurt. Waking up once a night and drinking a full bottle, being ravenously hungry during the day, and the clincher of all clinchers? As I was getting her dressed today I'm sure I saw an ankle! (As in, ankle bone - not cankle fat)

Someone's growing up, up, up!

xxoo.S

It's only 9am...

...and I've already seen someone doing a good deed today. While standing in line at Tim Horton's, I watched a guy cut up from the back of the line to pay for the current customer's order. The customer was a soldier, clearly buying not just coffee, but his lunch for the day (unless he starts his day with a sandwich? Huh, maybe.).

Anyways, this large man walked up from the back of the line, and asked the soldier if he could pay for his order. The soldier agreed, and said thank you. The large man replied, "No man. Thank you."

It was a small thing. I mean it's only lunch. But I think it made everyone standing there feel a little better about the world.

xxoo.S

PS - yes, that was the ooshy-gushy-touchy-feely-happy post of the year.

It doesn't take much.

We had a great weekend. Nothing that exciting happened, and we didn't get all that much "accomplished".

Just did some grocery shopping early Saturday morning. Spent the afternoon at a birthday party for one of Maddie's Babyville friends. I snuck out on Saturday night after dinner to hit up a movie with my BFF Liz (He's Not That Into You - easy, light-hearted chick-flick). Sunday morning was spent visiting over at G&L's, playing a bit of Rock Band, and just generally getting out of the house. We were home for lunch, Maddie had a nap and I did our taxes. Sunday afternoon was spent sorting through Miss M's clothes and pulling out some bigger stuff that I want to get out and ready for when the weather starts to warm up. And now it's bathtime...

As I recount it all here, it sounds incredibly mundane and boring.

It's one of the best weekends I've had in a while.

xxoo.S

And so it begins...

A friend of mine blogged some time ago about Meltdown City. In fact, re-reading her post, I realize that Maddie is around the same age that Izzy was at the time the post was written.

Huh, perhaps it's a developmental thing? 16 months = disastrous temper tantrums over nothing?

Who knows. I just know it's getting old. Quick.

Last night's meltdown ensued after watching her nighttime show, "In the Night Garden". The drama of the show ending (and heading up for her bath - a routine we follow every.single.night.) was apparently more than she could handle.

She cried as soon as the tv clicked off. She cried all the way up the stairs. She cried while I undressed her. While Seth ran the bath. While she was getting her teeth brushed. While she was getting her bath...

You get the picture.

And there was no calming her. Nothing could be done to end her perception of the tragedy that life had become at that moment. I couldn't calm her down. Distract her. Soothe her. Comfort her.

Nothing. Nada. Nyet.

She finally chilled out about halfway through getting her pajamas on. We read one book, drank some milk and went to sleep.

I feel for her. I really do. I wish she could explain to me what is wrong (beyond her teeth hurting - but they can't just start randomly hurting to that extent out of the blue, no?).

I hate feeling powerless and unable to calm her down. And I hate seeing her get so worked up over.... what? I still have no idea.

Meltdown City sucks. And that's all I have to say about that...

xxoo.S

Maddie says...

We've gotten to the "explosion" language stage where it seems like she's adding a new word every day. Often it's more a case of just repeating what I'm saying (um, time to watch the language...) - but after a bit, it sticks and becomes part of her repitoire:

• Uppie (all.the.time - this kid likes to be carried...)
• Dow (when she finally wants to be put down)
• Kickie! (yeah - that's a kitty...)
• Gocky (and that would be dog)
• Cruck (this is truck - but actually refers to all motor vehicles, her toy airplane, and sometimes even her stroller?)
• Joosh (she loves her some juice)
• Mommmmmmieeeee (yessss! it only took 16 months, but finally I can represent!)
• Da-eee (that would be Daddy - or actually, any photograph of a man that in any way resembles Seth, or an illustration of a man in her books, and even DVD covers - in fact she's quite convinced that the man on the front of the RocknRolla dvd is daddy - um, sweetie - that's Gerald Butler - Daddy's cute, but...)
• Peese (so proud to say that this is "please" - you know, for when she really, really wants something)
• Shhhh (combined with a finger at the mouth - this is often spoken after she, herself, has screamed or yelled or made some type of loud noise. Yes, shhhhh, indeed.)
• nnn-Hot (yeah, this isn't funny anymore)
• Kaow (and this would be cold - or anything that's not "nnn-hot")
• 'Cuse me (I'm not lying - she does this after burping, with a hand over her mouth)
• Cuck (this is a duck - also what a duck says - except that one sounds a bit more 4-letter-word-ish)
• Baw (ball, of course! And also used to refer to blocks and random other toys that I don't really see the connection to.)
  

What am I missing? The regulars I guess, "hi!", "bye-eeee", "mmmmm-uh" (kiss), "yesh" and "nonononononono". Working now on getting her to call the cats by name - I don't think she gets it - she's just like, um, no - that's kickie, not "Simon", weirdo.

xxoo.S

A little less whiny

Re-reading my last post, I realize I sound like a bit of a whiner... so I thought I'd change the subject and instead, write about how horrible of a mother I am...

On Sunday in the mess of multiple adults getting ready to attend friend's child's bday party, Maddie managed to finagle her way into the bathroom, unsupervised. Which really? Happens all the time - but at this particular time...

A bathroom that had a straightening iron (a fancy, professional, super-hot CHI) sitting on the counter, plugged in and on.

You all know where this is going right?

Fast-forward 30 unsupervised seconds to a screaming, crying, inconsolable toddler. She'd pulled the cord, so the straightener fell to the floor and then at some point touched the hot ceramic plate.

I rush into the bathroom, realize immediately what happened and hold both of her hands under the cold water tap.

After about a minute, I turn the tap off and survey her hands - a little red (which will happen when your hands are being held under freezing cold water) but no blisters...

And then we made the biggest mistake - we fussed and cooed and gave multiple kisses to the "owie" (which we finally tracked down to being her thumb on her left hand). And oh how she milked it. She's a smart one, that button.

Lessons learned:
1) Don't be such a dumb mommy re: hot appliances and easy toddler access.
2) Make sure to thank the baby gods for smiling down and giving me a mulligan on what could have been a much, much worse accident.
3) Stop teaching my daughter how to emotionally blackmail with guilt (kidding - I like hearing her say, "Owie?" and kissing it all better)...

xxoo.S

Doesn't seem fair

After a rough week, all I could do was look forward to the weekend where I would get a little R&R time. Except I don't feel like I really did. Seth went to a friend's cottage to go ice fishing on Friday night and Maddie had some sleepless nights and early mornings.

Hence, me, in a grump all weekend long. Which is kind of sad - and I hope I hid it well enough from Miss Button.

That being said - I certainly didn't hide it from Mr. Fisherman. Whatever - he got to sleep in on Sunday morning and that's just so not fair...

xxoo.S

Ummm, that's my duvet...

I thought we made it past the hurdle.

But perhaps I should've known better when the daycare provider (I NEED a nickname for this lady - DP?) told me the other little tot in her care was still experiencing symptoms. That was this morning. He's been sick for a week and a half now - on and off. What the 'eff do these kids have?

So Maddie had a few great days and then this morning - wanted nothing to do with breakfast. Apparently was pretty tired and crappy all day - but was totally cheery when I picked her up. Ate dinner no probs. Not a normal appetite - but enough to make me not even consider something was up. No pun intended...

Fast-forward to post-bath cuddle time. She's sleepy. We've read her stories. Now we're honing in the homestretch - bottle time. She took the majority of a bottle the past couple of nights - had to be coaxed a bit, but ended up taking it fine.

Tonight? I bring the bottle to her sightline and she vomits. Oh, I mean PROJECTILE. All over me. All over the duvet. And cried and cried and cried, while I just held her and rocked her and wondered if that slimy feeling on my neck was vomit - oh-yes-it-was.

I felt so bad for the little button. And all she wanted to do was go to bed (so you know she'll be up at 3am hungry and annoyed because she's just puked everything she could have possibly eaten all day long, and now her stomach is as empty as... whatever - too tired for metaphors...).

So she went to bed - happily. Snuggled down immediately and if I know her breathing - she was asleep by the time we watched the opening credits of Survivor.

But seriously - what the heck is this superbug? I thought it was maybe Rotavirus - but doesn't a fever go with that? And does it last for 10 days?!?

And also - not important, and I feel bad asking. But actually kinda important to me, even if it makes me a bad mom ... how do you wash a goose down duvet? Can you even? Cuz - gross. It's. A. Mess.

xxoo.S

PS - for anyone wondering - Seth is still sick too. Not puking sick - but still not eating more than one meal a day. Damn - either I've had this before (don't think so - would've remembered this gong show) or I have the immune system of Wonder Woman...

John Bonham's got nuthin' on her...

As promised - here's a pic from last weekend - our little drummer-in-the-making...


xxoo.S

Procrastination

Things I have done today:

• Called Rogers and revamped our services, and finangled about a thousand different discounts that will total over $100 savings each month from current bill (hey - all you have to do is ask, ummmm, and bitch a little...)
• Confirmed my new BB is being shipped by UPS tomorrow
• Called Revenue Canada and confirmed we actually aren't due to start repaying our HBP until 2010!!! Woo-HOO
• Emailed previous daycare provider about tax receipt errors and getting 2009 tax receipt before she goes and has baby and forgets we ever existed
• Emptied dishwasher
• Cleaned fridge
• Trolled Facebook for friends' updates
  
• Made grocery list
• Read numerous other blogs
• Spoke to my mom - Congrats again on the early retirement package, Mom!
  
• Uploaded pics on camera to our Flickr account
• Updated finances and pre-paid numerous bills (I love to set up the bills to be paid on specific dates automatically through online banking - does this make me a total nerd or does everyone do this?)
• Updated baby shower RSVP list
  
• Other random work things - seriously, I've been productive
  

Things I have not done today:

• Started to create the MASSIVELY IMPORTANT work presentation I am making on Friday. As in THIS Friday. Friday the 19th. 2 days from now (well, a day and a half).

xxoo.S

And another one goes down...

Maddie's sickness was passed along to... her Daddy. (Yessss - I was spared... so far... ahem, knock-on-wood).

Seth got felled just around the time that we were going through the bedtime routine on Monday night. He was laying there, of little help at all as I was manhandling her into her pj's, and just as I was about to get annoyed, he started complaining that his stomach was acting up.

Turns out, as I relayed my weekend update to our daycare provider, that one of the other kiddies at daycare was sick on and off all last week with the same thing, that also tore through his mom and dad as well. So now we know where she got it, and just how lucky we were that it didn't really affect her mood all that much (and that I was spared... so far... ahem, knock-on-wood).

Life it back to normal as of today, with Seth back at work and me, well, procrastinating from building a powerpoint presentation for a *big*important*meeting* on Friday...

Already I can't wait for the weekend...

xxoo.S

Sick

Maddie spent the weekend sick - from Saturday morning when she threw up her egg breakfast all over our bedroom carpet. I don't like eggs to begin with, and I can tell you cleaning up that mess was worse than any diaper...

She has been acting fine - but little to no appetite and completely off milk. So we've moved her onto the "BRAT" diet, and the bland food seems to be working at getting rid of the diarrhea and her upset stomach. Poor thing...

In other news, we stuck close to home this weekend. Doing a few things around the house, and visiting friends on Saturday afternoon. Maddie loved playing the drums with Daddy in the game, Rockband, and I'm sure she'd say it was the highlight of the weekend. I have some photos that I'll have to post for you soon.

Hope you all had a great Family Day long weekend...

xxoo.S

Happy Valentine's Day from Maddie

xxoo.S

"Toot"

Scene after tonight's bath:

Maddie toots.

Maddie says, "toot?".

I say, "Yep. That was a toot."

Seth says, "I love how our daughter says eight words. And one of them is, toot."

xxoo.S

I made it through

And so did she. From all accounts, Maddie had a wonderful weekend with her grandparents. And I... well I survived. I was lonely. But I was also sick. Which meant I spent a lot of time horizontal on the couch. So much so, I managed to watch the entire Matrix trilogy. Impressive if I do say so myself...

And while I didn't actually leave the house in any kind of social sense, I did manage to get my ass up off the couch long enough to organize the garage. Damn! That took energy (and over five hours). But look how awesome my new workbench looks now:

I made a pot roast for Sunday night dinner and am now about to get Miss Madeleine to bed and cozy up with the hubby for a Sunday night movie. Mmmmmmm ... I like these types of Sundays.

xxoo.S

My first day on my own

Yes, you read that time right.  It's 7:30am.  So much for sleeping in during my "weekend off".  I knew that was going to happen.

I also knew I was going to be sick (well, that didn't require psychic powers, I've been sick all week, and it's just lingering, not getting better or worse, just lingering...).  So instead of spending last night out at the movies with a friend, I spent it at home, watching tv and then taking a bath.

And instead of the accompanying glass of wine that I had fantasised savouring during my long, uninterrupted, guilt-free bath?  It was about nineteen glasses of water (my attempt to flush this snot out of my system).  Oh well, at least it was a 2+ hr bath.  And I didn't feel rushed or guilty the entire time...

So now, I'm up, it's early.  A pot of tea is steeping.  My local papers await (I've always been addicted to flyers, even before I was a retail marketing girl!).  I'm going to enjoy my morning before I work up the energy to tackle the garage.

It's supposed to be a gorgeous winter day - they say plus seven.  I hope you have something fun planned.

xxoo.S

Now THAT'S customer service

I got a shock yesterday.  I had sent some negative feedback to the makers of Maddie's highchair (it's the Chicco Polly - comes in fun colours that made us pick it in the first place).  

Essentially there tray is made in 2 pieces and therefore has a seam that bisects it horizontally (I've checked, most highchairs are not made like this - probably for the very reason I complained).  

What happens is, food gets stuck in the seam, and regardless of how vigilantly you try to keep it clean, eventually you have this brown, gross, grunge stuck in and under the seam that you cannot get out.

And so I complained.  Honestly, not expecting to get anything in return.  In fact, not expecting any type of response at all.  But I sincerely wanted to let them know that this was a design flaw, and hoped they would take it into account for future products.

Well I got a response about 4 days from sending the feedback.  They want to send me a new tray to replace the one I have. 

I have to say, I was really impressed.  (And not only because I'm getting a shiny, new, un-grungy tray)  But when's the last time you received amazing, RESPONSIVE, customer service from a company?  Much less a Spanish company (yes, the feedback form I filled out was Spanish).  So they forwarded the comment to their Canadian Distributor (Elfe) and that is who has responded back.

So there you go - there are some companies in this big, bad world that actually still care about their customers.

xxoo.S

A full week at a new daycare - and no complaints...

...yet.  Maddie's really settling in.  In fact, seems even more comfortable than she ever did when I dropped her at daycare.  It might have something to do with the number of kids that are there when I drop her off (hello distraction!).  Or maybe it's just a part of getting older, she is taking it a bit more in stride.  Or maybe it's just a better fit with this new provider, personality-wise, for Maddie.  Who knows.... And I hope I'm not jinxing anything, but it seems like it's working out well.

Except for the food.  That part I'm not loving.  Yesterday's lunch was grilled cheese (marginally better than the past lunch choices, this I actually do feed Maddie fairly regularly - although with "real" cheese, as I'm not a big cheese slice fan - and yum, have you ever had a grilled cheese made with extra old cheddar?).

But how do I bring it up?  And do I bring it up now?  Or do I wait a few more weeks?  Maybe this was just an "off" week?  Her website listed menus that focussed on healthy, nutritious meals that included veggies.  

I think I'll just hold off for now.  Maybe it was just an off week.  I'm hoping that's it.  

And yes, I realize how neurotically obsessed I sound....

xxoo.S

Dammit

By changing all the template info for my blog, I somehow lost all the info in my "Maddie's Milestones" list widget.

I thought I did everything properly. I saved my old template. I have backed up my blog for months. I can't believe it's gone. It will take me ages to try and remember everything I had listed. That was kind of the point... it was a list that had grown organically over our first year with Miss Maddie.

Dammit. Stupid blog and technology and stuff. And, well, stupid me...

xxoo.S

PS - it's also come to my attention that some of you are having difficulty leaving a comment.  Um - dammit again as I don't know why.  It's not giving me any trouble, so I'm not sure what the problem is there...

Fish sticks + fries

Just in case you were wondering what Maddie ate for lunch today at daycare. Oh well, at least the snacks are healthy. Although I had to google one of the afternoon snacks. Who's ever heard of Nilla Wafers before? Not me - that's a new one...

xxoo.S

Another "first"...

I'm approaching a milestone this weekend. My first weekend away from Maddie.

In fact, I'm not the one leaving - she's taking a roadtrip with Daddy to Kingston to visit her Grandma and Grandpa Vallier.

I think Seth was trying to do something nice for me - let me have a weekend off and do some things with my girlfriends. Enjoy a night out, be able to relax on my own the next day, hungover or not.

And I appreciate that. I really do.

But turns out that my girlfriends all have plans...

I do have a tonne of projects planned (like organizing my new workbench & tools!). So many projects in fact, that I doubt I will even get half of them done.

And so the weekend looms...

I am going to be getting together with one or two girlfriends for dinner / movie or something low-key. It will be fun. I will enjoy the time "off".

But dammit, I also know I'm going to feel so lonely this weekend...

Is that pathetic? I feel slightly pathetic. I think it's different if you're the one "going away". But when everyone is going away from you, I think it feels much worse. Dammit, now I'm all melancholy...

xxoo.S

Yesterday it was nachos

That's right. First day of daycare - hotdogs for lunch. Second day of daycare - nachos.

Seth is getting seriously jealous of Maddie's new diet.

Me - I'm coping. I re-read these posts, and I realize I'm coming off like a pious health nut.

And if you really knew me, you'd know that's really not me. In fact, I've been known to argue the validity of pie for breakfast.

But for some reason, I've been extra vigilant in trying to avoid all those "junk foods" that kids often get fed, because they're convenient. Hot dogs, kraft dinner, nachos... Preservative-laden, nitrate-ridden, processed foods.

I mean, every once in a while, it's fine. But not everyday... Anyone with me on this?

In all other aspects, this provider is fantabulous. Maddie is loving it there (she barely glances back when I drop her off - and this is only day 3!), there's lots of other kiddies around and they have a structure to their day, which I really like to see.

So I guess I have to give a little, right?

xxoo.S

What's going on here?

Yep - it's a new blog layout. Because clearly I'm not busy enough, I needed to add "completely redesign blog template" to my list of to-dos. Riiiiight. So it's rough. And in need of a colour massage. And a few other hacks that I'm not finding so easily right yet. But for now - here's our slightly more interesting bloggie-space.

Anywho - back to basics: My mom and stepdad came up to visit this weekend - that's why you haven't heard from us (me). It was a busy weekend starting as of Friday early afternoon. Besides general familial visiting, they were also up to make good on a Christmas gift. Which was to build a workbench in my garage.

I cannot tell you how exciting this is for me. I've been wanting to create some organization to our plethora of tools and random bits for over a year. Bags and baskets and bins and boxes of these things have been moved from corner to corner in our basement, and then finally up to the garage, where they lay on the floor, waiting for someone to come use them. Except we can't, because we don't know where anything is, or frankly, what we even have (which is why we have like, 5, levels - because we just keep buying more).

Sooooo - now I have my workbench. And my shelves. And my pegboard. Oh joy. Oh fun. Now I just need some actual time to spend out there, uninterrupted, to organize it all.

In other news - Maddie started at the new daycare today. From all accounts, she coped really well. Was a little shy, hung back a bit at first, but quickly came around and was right in there playing. Slept for 2 hours in the afternoon, and ate, ummm, hot.dogs. for lunch. Yep. Hot dogs. Not to sound all snobbery, but I've been avoiding feeding her hotdogs since she started eating solids. And now, she gets them for her very first lunch.

As Seth said - it's not like she's not going to eat hot dogs another thousand times. What's the big deal.

Indeed. I guess there isn't one. Except I died a little bit inside when I found that out. Hot dogs are just so. Gross. There. I said it.

On the upside, we get a written synopsis of Maddie's day now. At the end of each day. It includes how many diapers (wet vs full), her mood, what she drank (how many oz) and ate (mmmmm - hotdog!), how long she slept and general activities of the day. All in all - it's a fairly complete summary of her entire day. Pretty cool really.

In fact, as I read through her first daily synopsis, I realized, Yup. We totally made the right decision. And this daycare? Totally worth the $$$.

xxoo.S

Bang-tastic! Or bang-butchery...

I have followed in the age-old rite of passage for all moms. Butchering their child's hair in an effort to "trim her bangs".

Something I always promised myself I would never do.

*sigh*

I guess Maddie can just add that to the list of disappointments when she's 14 and telling me all the reasons I am a terrible, horrible, mother.

On the positive side of things - she now looks like an extra in the Lil Rascals with her toothless grin and scraggly hair. Undeniably cute!


xxoo.S

Driving me slightly crazy

Maddie's obsession with the cat dishes continues.  It's now all about the water dish.  She goes over to stir* the water with her spoons from her tea set.  She takes the cups from her tea set over and scoops out water and drinks** it.  She takes her wooden food over to the water dish and washes*** them.

I'm so tired of mopping up water, it's annoying.  Not to mention the grossness of thinking about her ingesting the kitty water... gross.  And again, annoying.  Full stop.

xxoo.S

*By "stir" I mean splash water everywhere with the spoon.

** And by "drink" I mean scoops the water out with the cup and pours it down herself, on the floor, everywhere it can possibly reach.

***And by "wash" I mean dunk them in the water, and then proceed to suck the water off them and throw the wet dripping pieces around.  Do it again.  And again.  Andagainandagainandagain.

Daycare drama

It's been a whirlwind week, both Seth and I being busy with insane work schedules (as always it seems - what happened to my supposed 20-30hr work week?).  Add to that the stress of ending daycare with our current provider, and gearing up to starting with a new provider (Alexise, our current provider, is going on maternity leave) next week.

Except, now we're not.  

So here's the story... 

We had been interviewing frantically starting in December, trying to line up a new daycare provider before Alexise went on mat leave.  We found a provider that seemed okay, and she was the same price as what we were currently paying for 4 days.  So, bonus, right?

Except I never really felt all that comfortable with this new provider.  Why was she so much cheaper than all the other daycares we had called?  And why didn't her children, that were home with her, integrate with the other kids in the daycare (they stayed upstairs all day apparently)?  And why didn't she have any paint or pictures on her walls?  (yes, I realize I'm a weirdo - but it made the "home" seem really sterile.  Like "just-moved-in" sterile).

But her hours worked, and like I said - there wasn't anything "technically" wrong with her.  So we sent her an email and said we were signing on, and that we'd like to start Jan 26th.

And then Christmas came and went.  And January started flying by.  And the closer we got to the 26th, the more I started to stress about this new daycare.  Until I finally just started combing through any new ads that had been posted, and calling those daycares.

Then, Thursday of this past week, I interviewed a lady.  Who. Was. Fantastic.  She teaches sign language (meaning, she'll continue our efforts - awesome!).  She has 4 other little ones in her care, a bunch of pre-school and after-school kids.  Her home is set up like a "daycare".  And she was just warm.  Nice and friendly.  Business-like, but clearly loved kids.  And asked to hold Maddie (do you know how often providers DON'T do this when you're interviewing?  Seems so odd to me)...

And of course, she's FAR more expensive than what we're currently (or were planning on) paying.  Of course she is.

And of course she needed an answer from us by Friday, because she had someone else lined up for the spot, but because we could start right away, she'd be willing to go with us.  

So on Friday, during the busiest of all days this work week, I also had to sort this out in my (our) mind.  Which did we go with?  Was I being unreasonable and weird with my "instinct" choice?  But did we really want to make our decision on daycare based on $$$?

In the end, we went with the fantastic provider.  Maddie starts on Feb 2nd.  I emailed the other provider and apologized profusely about cancelling at such short notice (don't feel that bad for her - she still had her ad posted, which was another weirdo thing to me). 

And now she's back with Alexise for one more week.  Haha.  I expect everyone thinks I am a neurotic crazy mom.

Good thing I know that I was neurotic and crazy before ever becoming a mom - so really, nothings changed for me...

xxoo.S

She did it again...

...last night. Slept-through. I woke up refreshed, and happy, and well... Not. Tired.

But I wonder why? Why are some nights now sleep-through nights, and some are still wake up nights?

As it gets later in the evening and my early-morning-serious-work-stuff-meeting looms, I find myself dreading the night (if there's a wake up) and fantasizing about it being another sleep-through night...

Inconsistency. Thy name is Madeleine...

xxoo.S

TV obsessed zombie?

When Maddie was a baby I was obsessed with her NOT watching any tv at all. I had read reports, studies, all sorts of things about how TV causes autism, TV causes aggressive behaviour, and how TV makes lazy kids (because they're being passively entertained, instead of going out there and "playing")...

I caught a lot of flak (or just "discreet" eyerolls) from my friends and family, especially whenever I actually tried to explain why I was against her watching TV at such a young age. I mean, seriously? She was a B.A.B.Y. It always struck me as strange that I even had to justify why I didn't want to put my 6 month old in front of the tv...

In the end, I ate my words and have started to introduce some TV into Maddie's day. Again (no judgement!) I REALLY don't believe in using TV as a babysitter. I don't believe that TV is the same as actually "playing". And I don't let her watch more than an hour of TV a day - meaning the TV isn't on as "background noise". My "background noise" is music (again, no judgement - I swear!).

But that hour? Her "shows"? Ohmygod she's obsessed. Like, completely and utterly obsessed with Loonette the clown on the Big Comfy Couch. And slightly less obsessed with anything Elmo on Play With Me Sesame. And turns into a scary-quiet-zombie for In the Night Garden.

What do you think Moms? How do you deal with the zombie-like-attraction that toddlers seem to have to the TV?

It's almost disturbing how zombie-like she gets for certain shows. And while I'm all for the educational value of some shows (or just getting 25 mins of peace so that I can make dinner) ... but I don't want her to turn into a couch potato and miss out on actual "live play" learning experiences. So for now, we will continue to limit her exposure. But that's just me - what do you guys think?

xxoo.S

PS - here's a pic of my little zombie watching tv from a "safe" distance in her chair!

5 day streak ... ended.

Well, it was a good run. It was enjoyable. I, personally, LOVED it.

But the "sleep through the night" streak has ended. And she went out with a bang - woke up last night (this morning?) at 5am quite upset. I tried to shush her through it, but in the end, it was a bottle that we needed.

Oh Maddie.....

xxoo.S

Happy birthday to meeeeeee

Birthday pluses:

• I got to sleep in until 9:30 - ah deliciousness! Oh - and that's on top of a 4-th consecutive sleep-thru-the-night night for Maddie. Woo-double-hoo
• Got my annual Swarvoski ornament and a pair of slippers. Oh and some scratch cards - that I even won a couple of bucks on!
• About to go have a luxurious bubble bath and then head out for a mani/pedi (my bday treat to myself).

Birthday minuses:

• Maddie is in devil-child-state today. Currently napping (FAR earlier than she usually goes down - like 2 hrs earlier than she should be sleeping) because the calamity of being awake was JUST. TOO. MUCH. And we have a kids bday party scheduled for later today - goodlordhelpusall...

• xxoo.S

The end of a long week

It's been a long week here at the Vallier household. Work-wise both Seth and I have been run off our feet - arriving home late, or completely missing the bedtime routine (I didn't get home from work until 10:30pm last night). Needless to say, we're both glad it's Friday...

And while I hate to jinx it (because we all know me even mentioning it will make this behaviour cease - but I can't resist bragging a bit)... Maddie has been sleeping through the night this week. 3 days in a row in fact. It's an incredible feeling, going to sleep and not expecting to be woken up. I didn't even realize how stressful it is going to sleep, expecting that you were going to be woken up in just a few hours. I didn't realize how stressful it was until I realized how much more relaxed I was going to bed the last couple of nights.

And yes - that means that I've gotten used to the privilege of sleeping through the night ridiculously quickly - I'm sure it means that tonight she will awaken at least 5 times and I will quietly lose my mind again...

Have a wonderful weekend peeps. I've got a date night planned with the hubby for Saturday which will involve a pampered dinner (completely with copious amounts of wine I can only hope), and maybe a movie, maybe stopping in to visit at a friend's birthday party...

In the meantime I will leave you with a cute-bum-pic... gotta love Levi's - they always make a girl's bum look good...

xxoo.S

A ladies weekend

This past weekend I had my very good, very old (old in friendship, not in age!) friend, Stefanie, up for a visit.

With Seth away for the weekend doing his infernal football fantasy draft weekend thingamabob, I decided what any self-respecting wifey would do. I organized a little weekend of my own. Including good girlfriends, good food (CAKE!) and good wine.

And it's always nice to have extra hands on deck to help out with the little monster. She's busybusybusy these days. I'm sure most 15 mos-olds are like this, but it literally feels like she spins circles around me and it's all I can do to keep up.

It was also L's birthday (which accounts for the CAKE! mention above) ... I hope she had a good time. I guess anything is okay when you've gotten kicked out of your house on your birthday weekend (her hubby was the host of the football weekend).

So that's that. We gossipped. And chatted. And laughed. And ate and ate and ate. You know, the things girls over the age of 30 do very very well...

This weekend is my bday - going out for dinner w/ the hubs while the little monster gets babysat by her Auntie L. I'm already picking out my dinner (and the accompanying drinks) in my head. Work has been nightmare-crazy for both Seth and I think week, so there will be a fair number of drinkies imbibed I expect.

I'll update you on our shinanigans on Sunday. In the meantime - watch Maddie eat cucumber and sign "please"...



xxoo.S